A scaly man the color of pure ivory with glinting silver eyes stands a few steps below me. His tall, slender form is both beautiful and terrible like most of the beings gathered here. He extends a hand to me. "First we shall celebrate, and then we shall return the coveted Nexus back to her world. This moment is a gift, and we shall relish it."
I nod and slip my hand into his, letting him lead me down the stairs. The monsters approach me to take my hand and kiss the back of it, giving me their thanks.
I catch sight of Shadow in the crowd, lurking in the background. The need to go to him is strong, but my self-respect is stronger. These people, these monsters, they want me here.
As I am continually greeted and introduced to monsters with names like Fither, and Trysops, I am treated with all the respect of a beloved ambassador from the human world.
A lump forms in my throat. I've never been wanted anywhere. Not like this. Not like so many. It may be a strange land and strange circumstances but my very basic impulse to belong grips me with all its strength.
If I could breathe the atmosphere, if it weren't toxic to me, I'd stay here. Where I'm wanted. My heart swells then rips into shreds at the idea of actually belonging somewhere. Of being in a place where I was respected and wanted instead of abused, neglected, or suspected the worst of.
I let out a shuddering breath, remembering what I have to go back to. The police. The man with the toothpick. All of them suspect me—rightfully so—of killing a very bad man who happened to be very powerful in the worst ways.
Not to mention, Shadow and I are done. I won’t be under his so-called protection anymore. A tremor of fear races through me. I’ll truly be alone.
"Evie," a rumbling comes from behind me after several hours of the party have passed. The crowd around me turns along with me to observe Shadow at my back. If I'm being honest, I felt him before he spoke. I always know where he is. Like a magnetic pull between my belly and his being, grounding me.
A couple of the monsters around me hiss. They don’t hide their dislike of Shadow's presence.
"I need to speak with you," Shadow says to me, ignoring the imperious and haughty looks being sent his way.
For a moment, I consider snubbing him. I've always been the one kept on the outside, and for the first time I have the opportunity to do the same to someone else.
As soon as the thought forms, I dismiss it. I may be a monster at heart, but I'm not like thosehumans. They are worse than any monster in my estimation.
I tilt my head to the group surrounding me and excuse myself before following Shadow off into an alcove that turns out to be a balcony. The landscape of the Nightmare Realm stretches out before me in all its hellish, grotesque beauty. This is the inspiration for all depictions of Hell I've seen in art, movies, and media.
I can't help but appreciate it for what it is. The way someone finds a dandelion beautiful and not a weed at all.
"We must go now," Shadow urges the moment we are alone.
My face tightens. "I'm not ready to go back. And I still have more time." A cough builds in my chest, but I suppress it. Strained puffs of air escape my mouth.
Shadow's eyes narrow, a flicker of frustration crossing his features. "Evie, you're not well. The atmosphere here is killing you slowly. We need to leave before it's too late."
I shake my head stubbornly, even as another cough threatens to escape my lips. "I'm fine," I insist, though my voice is strained.
I have thirty-six hours. That's what he said. That means I have twenty-eight left. I’ve been counting. "I want to stay a little longer. These people… " that’s not the right word but I barrel on, "they want me here. They respect me."
Shadow's shadows snap and coil around him, betraying his agitation. "They want the Nexus, Evie. They want what you represent. But I… I want you safe. I need you to trust me."
At the mention of trust, something inside me snaps. I whirl on him, my eyes blazing with a sudden fury. "Trust you?" I hiss, my voice low and venomous. "After everything you've kept from me? After the lies and the secrets?"
"Evie, please." He reaches for me, but I jerk away from his touch.
"I don’t trust you." I scoff, a bitter laugh escaping my lips. "You made me feel like I was second best. You let me believe there was someone else, someone more important than me."
Shadow's eyes flash with a mixture of pain and frustration. "You were never supposed to know about any of this, Evie. The Nightmare Realm, your role as the Nexus, the pressure of providing for an entire world… it was all meant to be hidden from you. This is wrong. You shouldn’t be here. You aren’t to know what you are."
I open my mouth to retort, but he presses on, his voice rising with each word. "I broke the rules for you, Evie. I defied the very laws of my kind to be near you, to protect you. And I was punished for it. Imprisoned, tortured, all because I couldn't bear to stay away from you."
I falter, my anger momentarily derailed by his revelation. "Shadow?—"
"No," he cuts me off, his shadows lashing out like whips. "You don't understand the weight of what I've done, what I've risked. I did it all for you, Evie. To keep you safe, to keep you from theburden of this knowledge. And you’re acting like a spoiled child, acting out and playing out revenge."
His anger sparks a twin flame in my chest.
A spoiled child?
