We survived another day.
Tomorrow we might not be this lucky.
Then Luca kisses me, and the familiar scrape of his lip ring anchors me to the bed. No more floating. No more rapids. I’m right here, right now, and that’s all I need.
I kiss him back, burying my hands in his hair. It’s tangled—my fingers catch on a knot—and our lips are cracked from the cold. But the imperfections make this exactly what I need right now: a reminder of why I’m fighting.
Malach shifts against my back, and I shudder.
He’s so close to me.
So solid.
It’s been almost seven years since I fled the celestial realm and left him behind. And gods, I’ve never admitted it to anyone, not even myself, but I missed him.
As I struggled to learn English and fit in, I missed him. Every time I fell off the pole, bruising my limbs and my pride, I missed him. And when strangers leered at my body without once glancing at my face, I missed him. The way he saw me, even when I didn’t want to be seen.
The truth is lava inside me. Boiling. Pressurized. Desperate to erupt. Now that I’ve admitted it to myself, it needs to come out.
“Luca,” I gasp, pulling away from our kiss. “I need to...”
“I know.” His familiar hazel eyes caress my face, and he presses a soft kiss to my cheek. “You’ve got this, baby.”
He helps me roll, moaning as Ciprian and Alistair work him over as if they aren’t the least likely teammates on this realm. Then Malach’s green eyes capture my attention. They’re searching my face with an intensity that shakes me to my core.
I whisper his name.
His pupils widen.
I shiver. “I thought of you every day, Malach. For the first year, I saw your face in every crowd and imagined you were by my side. I missed you so much. Leaving you behind andbreaking my vows is the worst thing I’ve ever done. Unforgivable.”
“Celine—”
“Let me finish, please.” My words come out strangled, but I push through. If I don’t tell him now, I might never get the chance.
“When you showed up again, I had to keep you at a distance. The way things used to be between us? That was dangerous for me because it meant I would lose you all over again, and I knew I wouldn’t survive it.”
“I don’t want to hurt you again, and I don’t know if I should even be saying all of this right now, but I needed you to know, in case you didn’t: I fucking missed you, Malach.”
His eyes are glassy—that beautiful green color I love so much that I painted my apartment to match. He doesn’t try to hide his emotions. Malach holds my stare and gives me a window into his heart, as if he never once considered an alternative.
A tear rolls down my nose, and he wraps his arms around me.
I sink into him until he’s all I see, hear, and smell. His heart pounds against my cheek, and I’m consumed with the need to close the loop on my senses and taste him. Ruthlessly, I quiet the scared voice inside my head. If I lose him, I will hurt. That remains true whether I kiss him or not.
“Malach?”
He tightens his arms around me. “Yes, my truth?”
“Can I kiss you?” The words hang between us, as fragile as butterfly wings, then Malach’s lips are on mine, rewriting our history with a single touch until all I can think about is giving him the best kiss of his life.
His lower lip is fuller than the top one. I nibble on it, then soothe the sting with the glide of my tongue. My hands get caught between us, and one of his thick thighs slides between mine.
For years, I’ve dreamed of getting lost in Malach’s kisses, butreality is better than the fantasy. He kisses with brutal sincerity, like he could spend months doing nothing else. There’s nothing practiced or rehearsed about it.
When I pull back for air, I’m panting.
“I missed you too.” Malach rumbles the words in ourthatshadialect, then switches to English and says, “We can talk about the vows later. Right now, I want to hold you while Luca touches you.”
