“Uneven?” His eyebrows pulled together. “You’ve had the same chances I have. Unless you mean…” His eyes widened as he stared at me. “Have you still not been able to orgasm? Even that night you stayed in the hotel with Isaiah?” He smirked, his teeth flashing. “Not even the bartender could do it? Oh, that’s rich.”
“I told you, I haven’t—”
He moved toward me too quickly, startling me into falling back against the wall. His hands landed on either side of me, pinning me in. The air in my lungs grew too thin as I shrank away from him.
“It’s because I’m the only one who really knows you. I’m the one you should be having sex with. Let me show you. I’ll use all the things I’ve learned. You’re going to like it, you’ll see.”
“Neil, I—”
His mouth covered mine, stealing my words. His body pressed me against the wall, blocking the lights behind him. He wasn’t kissing me like Neil. His tongue was sloppy, his mouth hard, and his fingers dug into my hips. I squeezed my eyes shut as he continued to kiss me, helpless not to compare it to that night at the bar when I’d been cornered outside the restroom.
Like then, it was as if a stranger was attacking me, not the man I knew. Someone else had to be doing this to me.
I tried to push him away, but his body trapped my arms. I tried to tell him to stop, but his mouth muffled the words.
He paused his kiss, gasping for breath. “I’ve gotten better. You’ll see. Just let me inside you again. I need you.”
I turned my head, his next kiss landing wetly on my cheek. “Stop, Neil. Please stop.”
“I don’t want to. You keep pushing me away, Hailey. How can you do that? I’m all you have.” His hand came up to my chin, trying to turn my face toward him.
His move freed my hands, and I shoved at him while trying to jerk to the side. I tripped over his leg, falling to the hardwood floor, my hand flying out to brace my fall. Pain shot through my wrist as I landed, and I cried out.
“Hails?” Neil sounded confused.
I held my wrist against my chest, trying to scramble farther away from him.
“What did you do? Stop. Let me see.”
“I’m fine,” I gasped, hobbling another step on my knees. “I’m fine. Just leave me alone for a minute. I just need a minute.”
“You’re not fine. Hold still and let me look at it.” The snap in his voice had me freezing. He was gentle as he reached for my wrist, but it throbbed under his touch.
I stared past his ear, my breathing too fast.
“I don’t think you broke it,” he said, letting me go.
“I probably didn’t,” I agreed, pulling my wrist in against my chest again.
“Fuck, Hailey. You wanted to get out of sex that badly?”
My chin tried to dip. I forced it up, forced myself to look in his eyes. He was annoyed. With me.
“I was saying no.”
He glared. “You always say no.”
“I get to say no!” My voice was too high. Shrill.
“Hailey, you’ve got to get past this. I know once you let me try again, we’ll be able to—”
I shook my head, and I kept shaking it. “You’re not listening. I said no. Do you know what it’s called when you have sex with someone while they say no?”
He grew still, his face paling. “It wasn’t like that. Don’t make it out to be like that.”
“What was it like, Neil?” I stared at him, feeling like I was looking at a stranger.
“It wasn’t—” His lips twisted, and his eyes squeezed shut. “I pushed too hard. You’re right, I shouldn’t have pushed so hard. I’ve just been so frustrated.”
