“Of course we hug.” Logan stepped into me, one arm curling around me briefly, and I held him back, my mind full of memories. He didn’t linger, stepping back respectfully.
“Here, sit,” Sean offered, giving up his barstool. He patted my shoulder. “I’ll let you catch up.” Before I could protest, he walked over to where Edgar was manning the door.
Logan took the seat, and I sat as well. We both glanced at each other, the silence between us awkward. I laughed. “This is wild. I was thinking about you the other day.”
“Hopefully good memories,” Logan said, resting his hand on the bar and turning his body toward me.
“Yes, they were.” My tension eased as I smiled at him.
He smiled back. “Good. That’s good.”
“So you’re still with the same band?” I asked.
“A new drummer, but otherwise pretty much. They might not—” He blew out a breath, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Well, truth is, I was a mess after we broke up, so they might not be too nice to you.”
My smile fell as my chest grew tight. “Oh.” I couldn’t think of anything else to say.
“That’s not on you. You made your choice, and I respected that.” He blew out a breath, studying my face. “It was my own problem that I was already head over heels for you.”
“You were?” Guilt rose, but hidden underneath was a selfish happiness. “But you never—” I broke off, clearing my throat.
“I figured it was too soon. Then Neil did what he did.” He tapped the bar, looking at his hand. “I believed you when you said you two were friends, so it caught me off guard.”
I winced. “We were just friends. I didn’t lie to you. He surprised me, too.”
“No, I know. But you chose him.” Logan shrugged. “It’s all water under the bridge. Let’s just say, the band got sick of all the breakup songs after a while.” He smiled at me. “You were my muse at the time. Both before and after.”
A tingling took over my scalp as I stared back at him. It was like looking at the path not taken, and regret dug into my heart.
Logan moved his other hand to the one on the bar, twisting the gold wedding band he wore. “I have different muses these days. The band just started touring again now that my second daughter is three.”
“Second daughter.” I repeated the words. Logan was married and had kids. I should have been happy for him, not… not whatever this twisting ache in my gut was. “Can I see?”
He grinned. “Sure.” Taking out his phone, he brought up one of his pictures, turning it toward me.
My throat tightened as I studied it. His wife was pretty, her hand on their older daughter’s shoulder as they both leaned into Logan, who was holding the three-year-old.
“You look happy. I’m happy for you.” I was, I told myself, and it was true. Only that wasn’t why my chest felt so tight.
“How about you? You and Neil must have a whole household by now, what with how much you wanted to build your own family.” He put away his phone, smiling at me. “My bandmates warned me away from you before we broke up, what with you talking kids right away, but I understood why it was your biggest dream, with your past.”
My neck felt tight now, too. “Oh, um, no. No kids yet. Neil wanted to wait.” I rested my hands on the top of the bar, staring down at my bare finger.
“Not even married?” he asked, his voice deep, almost gruff. He cleared his throat, staring ahead at the bottles over the bar. “But you’re still together?”
“I’m still with Neil,” I agreed, trying not to think about how he was likely currently having sex with someone else.
“Well, that’s…” He grimaced, blowing out a breath. “Shit, that’s just bullshit, Hailey. I’m sorry, but that’s how I feel.”
A lump rose in my throat. “I know Ihurt you,” I started.
“No, fuck that. This isn’t about me. That’s bullshit for you.” He reached out, tucking my hair behind my ear before letting his hand fall away. “You deserve better. You always have.”
I shook my head. “Neil’s important to me.” He was all I had, and even he was slipping away.
“You’re still saying that?” Logan sighed, slipping off the stool. “I’m going to tell you the same thing I told you back when he butted in between us. You need to make the best decision for you. Foryou.” He patted my bent head. “Good luck, Hailey,” he said, walking away.
It wasn’t long before the band started up again. It wasn’t a song I remembered. He sang about being a family man, happy to be tied down.
