Neil’s head lowered, and he nodded.
A tremor moved through Jack’s body as he stepped away from me. He retreated to the bumper of my car, leaning a hip against it.
“Seriously?” Neil glared at him again. “That’s maybe three feet away! Hailey, let’s—” He reached for my arm.
Jack cleared his throat loudly, and Neil’s hand jerked away.
“Can you please come inside with me for a few minutes?” Neil asked me.
The thought of being inside alone with him made ants crawl along my skin. I stepped sideways on the grass instead, moving across the lawn to the tree we’d once planted together. It had never really grown, the leaves tinged brown on the stunted branches that barely reached my shoulders.
“How’s this?” I asked quietly, turning to find him already close behind me. I stepped back to create more distance.
“I guess it’ll have to do,” Neil muttered, glancing toward Jack.
Jack was no longer within a few steps of us, where I could put out a hand and reach him, but his eyes were steady as he watched on. I never minded Jack’s eyes on me, and this was no different. He was being protective, that was all, and it let me lift my chin as I faced Neil.
“I’m not sure what else there is to say. I no longer want to be with you. Making me keep saying it isn’t going to make this easier on either of us.”
“I’m falling apart without you.” Neil’s shoulders hunched. “I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I miss you, Hails. I just miss you.”
The twist in my stomach became a suffocating knot. A part of me wanted to reach out, to soothe the quiver to his lip.
“It was so bad that I missed work. They’re putting me on performance review. I miss a couple of days, and they act like I’ve been a problem all along. I can’t lose this job. Then what will I do?”
I almost laid a hand on his arm, but I tightened my grip on myself instead. Ignoring the dejected look in his eyes made me feel like I was being mean.
“And my parents. They don’t understand what happened, and I’m not sure how to explain it to them. They love you too, Hailey. You’ve been like a daughter to them.”
I shook my head. “I can’t help you with them anymore. You need to tell them to stop calling me.” In the past week, they’d left more messages than Neil had.
“They just want to help! They see how wrecked I am without you. I need you, Hailey.”
Once, hearing those words would have been enough. “You don’t.”
“I do!” Neil took a step forward, and I flinched back, making him freeze. “Seriously? You act as if I’m going to hit you or something. When did I ever hit you?”
I swallowed. “It’s not that.”
“I know I messed up that morning, but you messed up, too. You were with him!” He waved back at Jack, who had pushed off the bumper, hovering a step toward us.
Meeting Jack’s eyes let the knot in my stomach loosen again. I looked back at Neil. “You were with a lot more people than I was.”
“Is that what this is about?” Neil sighed. “It’s not my fault fewer of your hookups worked out. I can give you more passes if that’ll help. I won’t do anything with anyone else, but I can help you meet up with a few new guys if that makes you feel better.”
The thought of being with a stranger made me shudder. “No. I’m not doing that. I’m not coming back to you, Neil.”
His jaw tightened, the muscle in his cheek flexing. “You’re really willing to throw away all our years together? It’s only been a couple of weeks, Hailey. We can still fix this.”
“I don’t want to fix it,” I admitted. “I don’t want to be with you.”
“Stop saying that!” Neil threw up his hands, and I flinched, stumbling back a step, my heart racing. “You’re doing it again! You’re acting like I—”
Jack was suddenly with me, his hands resting on my shoulders.
Neil jerked back, his eyes looking nervous.
“You need to quit yelling at her,” Jack told Neil. “Right now.”
