Duncan is sleeping so peacefully and I find myself torn between wanting to run and climbing back in bed with him. However, sleep is the last thing on my mind. I want to wake him up with my mouth on him, but I can't do that. I have plans for my life and things to take care of. I can't put anyone else in danger from my stalker. Plus, he's Ana's brother.
I search out my clothes and dress, finding my key in the pocket. On the floor by my dress is the key Duncan gave me earlier. I leave it and my torn thong. Grabbing my heels, I back to the door, waiting for him to jump up and stop me. I open the door as quietly as I can, then cross the hall. Walk of shame, yep that's me.
Looking down the hall in both directions, I don't see any witnesses and enter my room to the darkness of my life. I can't be with anyone, but I want to be with him. All day, whenever hetouched me, my body would react to him. I've never had that feeling with anyone before.
After a shower, I tie my hair up on top of my head and walk to the adjoining door. Ana left it open a crack, and I slip into her room and crawl into her bed, just like when we were younger. God, I miss her. She shifts to face me.
"I was wondering if you were going to come in here. Still sleep restlessly I see."
"Yeah." What can I say, since my parents died I wait for the other shoe to drop? I'm so afraid of being alone, I don't let people close, except her and Derek. I also very rarely sleep without nightmares.
"Was the bar still open?"
"No, I was walking in the garden again." My lie is to save her as much as me. How could I explain to her about Duncan?
"Maya, I love you. You will never be alone." She squeezes my hand.
"Thanks, Ana. You know I won't judge if you want to talk."
"Oh yes, I know. There is nothing to say. Jonathon just likes everything perfect, even to a fault. Nevertheless, he is my choice and he will take care of me. Please forget what you think you saw."
I smile into the dark and hug her. "Okay, just this once. But if he hurts you again, he will die." She doesn't reply back to that and I wonder if I hurt her or if she is just ignoring me.
As I drift off, I realize she didn't say she loved him, just that he was her choice.
CHAPTER NINE
MAYA
We wake up early and head to the salon, where we spend the day being beautified. My hair is piled up on my head with loose curls falling around my face and neck. They did my makeup darker than I usually wear it. Ana is a vision, her blond hair is pulled into a tight chignon at the back of her neck and her makeup is subtle, yet also harsher than what she usually wears. I help her dress in a very-unlike-her wedding dress. The ball gown style with lots of beading, appliqués, and lace sleeves is nothing like the dress she would talk about when we were younger. I want to ask if he picked it out too, but I won't upset her today. James steps into the room and practically starts crying.
"My girls, you both look so beautiful. If your mums could see you now. Anabel, your mum would be so proud of the woman you have become. Maya, darling, you look somuch like your mother. In fact, I remember she had a dress just like that, same color and everything, for her sorority formal in college. It’s funny that Ana would pick an almost replica of that dress."
Jonathon picked my dress, not Ana. Before I can process his words further, the wedding planner steps in.
"Showtime, ladies and gentleman."
We step into the hall and await our cue. At the start of the song, I walk through the doors and down the aisle, keeping my focus on the minister at the front of the hall. My attention slips to the garden behind him, the doors and windows open. I will never think of that garden the same way. I will never think of Hyde Park the same way either. Part of me wants to look for Duncan, but I know that would be bad, he isn't for me and I don't want to hurt what little family I have left. I join Jonathon and his best man waiting at the altar. For the life of me, I can’t remember the guy’s name. He leers at me and I want to vomit in my mouth. I turn to watch Ana and James make their way down the aisle. She looks pretty, but she isn't smiling like I would expect her to. She has a smile on her face but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She is looking at Jonathon but it isn't the look of a woman completely in love with the man she is marrying. It's a look of resignation.
As they reach us, James waits for his line, and with a loud voice says, "Her family and I give her away." Tears spring to my eyes as he looks at me when he says family.
The rest of the ceremony is a blur, and when we walk back down the aisle, following Jonathon and Ana, the best man squeezes my hand, making me feel like I need to bathe in a peroxide bath to get the germs off me.
We make our way to the ballroom and watch as Ana andJonathon start the receiving line. People are walking up, hugging and congratulating them. I see Duncan walk into the ballroom and about swallow my tongue. He looks so good in his traditional tuxedo. I can see his arm muscles flex under the jacket, his legs strain the pant legs, the understated pin striping of the dark charcoal suit adds to the depth of the color. He and James are in matching tuxes with silver vests and ascots. My mind flashes to what Duncan looks like out of it, but he looks so yummy in it too. He catches me looking at him and stalks toward me. I see the intent in his eyes and know I don't want to have this conversation in front of everyone. Needing a quick escape, I head for the wedding coordinator and check on the arrangements for the dances and coordination of speeches. I need to avoid him or I'll be finding the nearest closet to fuck him in.
I've managedto evade Duncan most of the night. It was easier during dinner, as I had to sit at the head table with Ana and Jonathon. Throughout the night, I’ve felt his eyes on me, like now. When I look in his direction, he seems upset. The best man is spinning me on the dance floor; he’s been trying to get me alone, attempting to pull me toward the balcony and garden several times. I'm about to break his wandering fingers when Duncan’s deep voice rumbles behind me.
"May I cut in?"
"Of course, don't keep her too long though, she has maid of honor duties."
Really, this guy is a jerk.
Duncan chuckles and I bristle. He pulls me into his arms and the feelings of want and security wash over me. Why him?
"Finally... Are you avoiding me? Or do I need to kick that fucktard’s arse to prove he is not for you?"
The growl in his voice immediately makes me wet for him.
