“He what?”
“Anonymously. But yeah. A few thousand dollars.”
“What the hell? He’s trying to buy your forgiveness?” He exhales through his nose. “And why didn’t Mom tell me about that?”
Gloria holds up her hands. “Guys. Chill out.”
I take a deep breath. I do need to calm down. Blaine and I have argued before, and we’ve both got strong personalities, but this feels like it’s headed toward something we can’t fix easily.
“If you bring him around, I don’t want anything to do with him, either,” Blaine mutters.
“I’m not going to bring him home or anything,” I say. “It’s not serious.”
Our little argument has put a damper on the evening, and it’s my fault, as usual. I don’t know why I can’t just leave things alone. I didn’t even get to tell them I got into med school, and now I feel like the moment to do so has passed. Before we leave, Gloria hugs me and whispers something in my ear.
“He loves you no matter what,” she says. “He just worries about you.”
I pull back and squeeze her hand. “I know. I’m not going to force him to play nice with people he hates.”
Apprehension fills me. It doesn’t matter how lovely the dates with Grant are, or how good the physical stuff is. Blaine’s reaction is reason number 1,323,827 why I can’t actually be with Grant.
21
GRANT
A few days after my date with Kendall, we’re in the clinic together. I only have two weeks left on this rotation, and I’m savoring the days I get to see her.
What am I going to do if she decides she doesn’t want to continue this? An image of myself a few weeks from now flashes through my mind, a hypothetical where I’m nursing emotional bruises in various stages of healing and putting myself back together, hoping I can eventually forget about her. A dart of anxiety pierces me. Despite how she seemed on our date, if she makes good on her promise to go our separate ways, this is going to hurt.
I pass her in the hallway, and, after glancing around to make sure no one is watching, I let my fingertips trail over her waist. She gives me a wicked little smile that lights me up inside.
Dr. Fields catches me after lunch. “It seems you’ve resolved whatever issues you had with Kendall.” He clears his throat. “I’m glad for that.”
Thankfully, Dr. Planck hasn’t told Dr. Fields about how we’re “getting along.”
“It was a misunderstanding,” I say, though that’s not really the truth. I’m not about to tell the attending physician about my history, though. “We’re fine now.”
I wish I had more time to spend with her. We can’t really talk at the clinic, and I spend so much time working right now that my hours outside of my job are limited. I sit next to her near the end of the day when we’re both documenting in our shared office. I need to work on my administrative stuff or I’m going to be here forever, but I can’t pass up a chance to be in her presence.
The room we’re in is closed off from the rest of the clinic, and no one else is using it right now. I shift toward her. The wheels of my office chair squeak in the silence. “How’s your brother?”
She grimaces a little, then tries to cover it with a more stoic expression. “He’s okay.” She looks at me, and her hazel eyes flash with hurt. She squeezes the mouse she’s using. “He reminded me of that time you stole my clothes, and I had to go home in the cold with shorts on. I tried to defend you by saying you gave them back, but I don’t think he bought it.”
Damn it all. Just when I think I’ve come to terms with how I treated her, I’m reminded of some other awful thing I did. Hot shame clogs my throat. It takes me a second to even register what she’s actually telling me.
“Wait. You told your brother?”
She looks around, likely to make sure we’re really alone. “That we’re having sex? Not in those terms, obviously. But I mentioned we’re involved.”
“And, uh, how did he take it?” That’s a stupid question. She just told me how he reacted.
“He’s angry at me. Rightfully so, I guess.”
“Yeah.” I swallow. “For what it’s worth, I’m so sorry for that particular incident. I know you didn’t have a lot of clothes to spare. Especially in the winter.”
“Summer was worse, anyway. Our air conditioner never worked very well. The heat and humidity was awful. I remember Mom telling us to lay really still and we would feel better.”
I glance toward the door again, then I cover her hand with my own. “You don’t ever have to live like that again.”
