I was ready to give up on Isolde. Nine months ago, I confessed my love for her, told her I understood why she could never feel the same, and promised I was done chasing her and trying to force something that was no longer between us.
That’s when she finally agreed to give us another shot—so long as we kept it secret.
I agreed, even though I want to shout that she’s mine to every asshole who looks at her. But that would mean losing her for good. It’s unfair, and I’m done being everyone’s shameful secret. I’m the commander now—the title I spent years trying to earn, hoping it would prove to her and my father that I’m enough.
So why aren’t I?
“Wilder’s a real idiot for going after Leigh alone,” I mutter. Isolde’s gaze pins me, sharp and unreadable. Silence stretches. My heart wavers. “Who does he think he is, anyway? I swear, he can’t last a day without playing the hero. Golden Boy Dunn—guess some things never change.”
Isolde crosses her arms, canvas jacket crinkling. “Maybe he went after Leigh because helovesher.”
“Maybe he can’t stand to rely on me for anything.”
“Yeah, I am sure he was thinking of you when he heard Leigh had disappeared.”
“Abandoning your post to lecture me, Faez? Maybe I should send you away like Jaxson.” My voice sounds colder than I mean it to.
Sol bristles. “We’ve got two cities’ worth of Blades backing us up. Nothing’s getting through that portal except Leigh and Wilder.” She shoots me a glare. “And swear to the gods, if you call me Faez again, I’ll slap sense into you. Call me Isolde or Sol, like you always do. Seriously, you’re starting to weird me out.”
I laugh darkly. “I thought only friends called you Sol. And if I am your commanding officer, can I also be your friend?”
“Stop.”
“Stop what?”
“You’re being bitter for no reason.”
I straighten. “No reason? You let Jaxson treat me like shit because?—”
“Not here.” Isolde vanishes into the tree line.
A muscle in my jaw twitches. Jax has been a dick all night; the party was just the start. I breathe in, count to five, and head for the shadows between the trees. This talk is long overdue.
The forest eats the light, and sudden blindness makes my skin crawl. “Sol?” I call out.
No answer. Not even a crunch of leaves.
“Come on, where are you? Enough with the games.” My voice snakes between the pines.
She’s messing with me. She knew I’d follow, and she’s making a point by staying silent. I can’t stop obsessing over Wilder—about us. About how Wilder always gets everything, including her.
“Boo!” Isolde slips out from behind a thick trunk.
I yelp and instinctively reach for my gun. She doubles over in laughter.
Dammit, why can’t all her smiles be for me?
“You scream like a terrified recruit,” she teases.
I clear my throat. “I do not.”
She arches a brow. “You scream so manly, like a bear or a lion. Better?”
I scowl, folding my arms. “You’re talking down to me again.”
“Am I, Commander?”
“Insubordination has consequences.”
