“What is going on down here?” Mom asks.
A few guests glare at me from behind her. Their gazes shift from a trembling Juliette to Jaxson with his hands still on me, to the broken window, to me. The reality of the situation sinks in, and the red haze of fury slowly dissipates. Is that what Juliette wants? To make me look like the bad guy?
Juliette sobs, her shoulders shaking with exaggerated grief. She buries her face into Mom’s shoulder, and Mom freezes before wrapping her arms protectively around my aggressor. The gesture is a knife to my heart.
“She attacked me, Chiara,” Juliette cries.
Mom gasps. I want to curl up in a ball and disappear from the disgust in her eyes. She has never looked at me like this before. Like I am a monster that doesn’t belong, a creature to be feared and reviled.
“You win, Juliette,” I finally say. I run from the room. Upstairs, I race for the front door and fling it open to be swallowed up by the night, to disappear into the darkness and never be seen again.
I am halfway up the street when I can barely see through my tears.
“Desiree, wait up!” Jax calls.
“Jaxson, please, leave me alone,” I say through sobs.
But he reaches me before I can argue further. “You don’t mean that,” he says.
I can’t be with Jax, no matter how much it hurts to think that. We’re fundamentally different, like opposite seasons—he’s the embodiment of summer, full of warmth and life, while I’mthe harsh reality of winter, cold and empty inside. As strong as it may be, our love is a crutch, preventing us from growing and achieving our true potential.
As a vampire, I’ll never be able to give Jax the life he deserves. He deserves a partner who can walk alongside him, pushing his dreams and aspirations. Someone who yearns to see him succeed with a loving family and children to cherish.
This knowledge shatters my heart into a million pieces, but I know I can’t be that person for him. My sole purpose is to return to the Nest.
It’s time for Jax to see the truth. I’m not the girl for him. Letting him go is the hardest thing I’ll ever do, but it’s the only way to set him free and find the happiness he deserves. He would never do the same for me. That much is clear, or he would be in Glaucus right now.
“You’re such a hypocrite,” I say.
Jax’s eyes widen. “How?”
“You always solve your problems with your fists, yet now that I have the strength to fight my battles, you won’t let me. Why? Too scared I won’t need you?” I know I’m taking out my anger at Juliette on him, but I can’t stop. I’m shaking like a leaf from head to toe.
“Maybe when we were kids,” he says, “but things are different now. We can’t go around hurting people because we feel like it. That’s not who we are.”
I shake my head. Nothing has changed since we were kids. We are older, that’s it. We are still clinging to each other because there’s no one else.
“You don’t know me,” I say, turning on my heel to leave.
“So, it’s like that?” Jax shouts.
I spin to face him, my hands on my hips. “Like what?”
“Is it that easy for you to walk away from me?” His words punch me in the gut. “I said I love you, Desiree. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
I shrug, even though my heart sinks. Of course it does. “You had it right when you dumped me. We are not meant to be together. I’m not good enough for you.”
“Stop saying things like that.”
“You need to let me go. Move on with your life!” I say, and he flinches. “You have your future at your fingertips. We couldn’t be more wrong for each other if we tried. I’m avampire.”
Jaxson’s eyes search mine. “So? There are ways around that.”
I scowl. “If you mean thecure, then?—”
“Your mom is brilliant, Desiree. If there’s a cure, she’ll find it.” I scoff. If he only fucking knew. “You can be a witch again. We can be together,reallytogether. Wilder doesn’t care, and I was a fool for letting you go. All I want is another chance,” he says, cupping my cheek.
I lean into his touch, savoring the feel of his skin against mine. Then I push him away, my heart breaking with the action. “What if I don’t know what I want?”
