Renza smacked the table with his palm. “Nigga, I still can’t believe you shot all this nigga shit up.”
Pressure pointed at him. “Shut yo’ ass up. You was scared.
“Nigga, wasn’t no fuckin’ body scared,” Renza said, but he slid his chair like the memory made him nervous. “I was alert. That’s different.”
Blaqson looked between all of us, confused. “What the hell y’all talkin’ about? Who shot what?”
“This nigga Pressure knocked me the fuck out.”
Pressure lifted his cup. “Yup.”
“And then,” I continued, pointin’ my blunt at him, “him and Renza dragged my ass outside and left me layin’ in the driveway like I was trash day.”
Renza said, “Shiddd, we ain’t know what else to do. You was a big ass body to move, too.”
Pressure groaned loud like the story annoyed him, but he was drunk enough to laugh. “Man, this fool woke up outside and emptied a whole clip into my driveway like he was shootin’ at ghosts.”
“It wasn’t ghosts,” I said. “It was yo’ bitch ass for puttin’ me outside.”
Renza took a sip from his cup, and he started laughin’ again. “I keep tellin’ people to leave this crazy nigga alone.”
Pressure pointed at me with his cup. “You fixin’ my cars back. All of ‘em. Every bullet hole.”
I shrugged. “Nigga, just ‘cause I wrapped them bitches don’t mean I gotta fix ‘em.”
I leaned back in my chair and exhaled smoke slow. “I know where I went wrong though. I shouldn’t have talked to Pluto like that.”
Pressure raised both his eyebrows. “You damn right.”
Renza nodded too. “Pluto? Nigga, that’s our girl. You was wildin’.”
“I know,” I said. “I was pissed and not thinkin’. But I shouldn’t have snapped on her like that. She ain’t deserve it.”
Pressure lifted his chin. “She wasn’t off the hook neither though. I told her ass to leave y’all marriage alone and she still jumped right in the middle of it. So, her and you both deserved what came behind that conversation.”
I blinked. “Y’all got into it?”
Pressure smirked, his eyes barely open. “I had that woman on dick punishment for weeks.”
Renza choked on his drink. “Nigga, what? You? You had Pluto on punishment? Boy, shut the hell up. You can’t even go a week without humpin’ somethin’. I know you lyin’.”
Blaqson spit out some liquor, laughin’. “Dick punishment? Ain’t no way you survived that shit. Pluto probably had you tremblin’ like a withdrawal patient. How was that lil’ situation?”
Pressure lifted one finger like he was teachin’ a class. “A productive one.”
I shook my head, laughin’ ‘cause he was dead serious even though he could barely see straight. “Nigga… what is dick punishment? ‘Cause I know yo’ horny ass ain’t talkin’ about no damn celibacy plan.”
Pressure sighed like we annoyed him. “It means she wasn’t gettin’ none. I told her she needed to chill and stop gettin’ in shit that ain’t her business, and she ain’t listen, so I put her on hold.”
Renza slapped the table. “So, you went on strike? Boy, shut up. You ain’t got the stamina to strike from Pluto.”
Blaqson pointed at him. “I don’t believe it nigga. Pressure, you got a whole addiction problem. You the last muthafucka who need to be punishin’ anybody. Pluto probably laughed at you and walked off.”
Pressure leaned forward, offended as hell. “Man, fuck y’all. I’m serious. I was strong as hell. Mind over matter.”
Renza hollered. “Mind over matter? Nigga, you was probably humpin’ the air at night tryna stay focused.”
Blaqson covered his face. “This fool talkin’ about discipline.”
