“You called me your little hedgehog.”
“It’s cute.” He chuckles, shaking his head. “Because you’re prickly. You’ve had to be, but you’re also cute as sin. If it bothers you though, because of your past…”
My eyes well with unexpected tears as my bottom lip trembles. “Fuck,” I whimper.
“What?”
“That’s, um, that’s what my mom said when they gave me the hedgehog stuffie. She said I knew how to stand up for myself but I couldn’t hide how cute I was.” I can’t stop a tear from escaping.
Specter wraps his arms around me, and as I press my forehead to his shoulder, I let myself cry for the first time in years. How did he do this to me? How did this man dig his way through my defenses and get straight to my heart?
“I hope it doesn’t make you sad,” he says.
I shake my head, lifting it to meet his gaze. “No. It makes me feel seen. Thank you.”
Specter wipes my cheeks with the back of his hand. His expression is intense, his eyes searching mine, lips parted.
“I’m in love with you, Colson.”
My jaw drops.
“That’s the only explanation for what I’m feeling right now. It absolutely has to be love, and if it’s not, I couldn’t handle feeling more than I do. I… Fuck, I would die for you.”
“I don’t want you to die for me. I want you to live for me. Stay with me. Please, fuck, don’t give me this and then take it away.”
“I won’t. Can I kiss you?”
I can’t even speak, so I just nod. Specter smashes into me, our lips colliding in a passionate dance as my body does its best to merge with his and I desperately claw at his shoulders.
He loves me.
And fuck, I believe him.
Is that what I feel? Is that the burning in my stomach, the giddy flutters in my chest? Does being in love also feel like dying? Is that good? Oh god.
Specter breaks the kiss before I’m ready, holding my face between his strong hands. “I’m going to find your stalker. We are. I’ll end it and then we’ll start our life together.”
“I think we already started.”
A slight smile tugs at his lips. “Fuck, I love you so much. I can’t believe it. I didn’t think I would recognize it if it ever happened to me, but here it is, clear as day.”
“I think… um… I don’t know if?—”
He presses his fingers to my lips. “You don’t have to say it back if you’re not ready. I’m gonna be here, loving you with everything I’ve got until you are ready. Until you feel safe enough to love me back. I’ll wait.”
Yeah, no, he’s not real.
“Now, the plan,” Specter says, redirecting the conversation. “I’m tired of waiting. We need to draw him out.”
“Draw him out? Like, how?”
His expression hardens. “By doing the very thing I didn’t want to do, but I don’t see a way around it.”
I nod as it settles in. “I have to go to my apartment.”
“Seemingly alone, but you won’t be.” He squeezes my hand. “Shadow gave me a week to deal with this so I can focus all my energy on it. I’ll find him.”
“What will you do to him?”
