I watch his amazing ass as he disappears into the bathroom. Once he’s out of sight, I take several deep breaths to shove down the desire to run. I have nowhere to go, and for once, staying put might be a good idea.
I don’t know what we are to each other, but I am sure that he’s going to keep me safe. That’s not what I’m afraid of though. It’s the crumbling of another little piece of my protective armor every time he touches me that scares the fuck out of me.
When he returns, he’s holding a warm cloth. I try to take it, but he tsks at me, gently wiping my skin clean of my cum. I wish his was dripping out of me, marking me from the inside, proving that I really am his, whether I want to be or not.
“Do you need water?” he asks.
I shake my head, my eyes growing heavy. “I need sleep.”
He nods, gesturing to the spot behind me. I scoot back and slip under the blankets, feeling somewhat sheepish all of a sudden.
Specter climbs in beside me, turning on his side to face me. I’m expecting something arrogant from him, but as his eyes roam across my face, I feel my defenses falling away.
“Thank you,” he says. “For sharing your body with me.”
“It’s no big deal. You’re not the first guy I’ve let fuck me.” Why did I say that? Fuck.
“What if I’m the last?” He moves a little closer. “What if I never let you go? You could be fucked like that every day for therest of your life.” His fingers move under my chin. “And if you try to tell me you weren’t impressed, I won’t believe you.”
I scoff but remain quiet.
Specter kisses my forehead. “Now get some sleep.”
Apparently, he doesn’t expect an answer, which is good, because I couldn’t possibly give him one. He was right—nothing will be the same after that. I just can’t decide whether that’s a good or a bad thing.
I watch Specter as he closes his eyes. He’s something else.
My hole is still throbbing from what he did to me, and that feeling brings a satisfied smile to my lips. Maybe I could let myself enjoy this a little. There’s no way it’ll last; that’s not who I am. But while it does, I could… maybe. My breath catches as the thought comes to me and Specter’s eyes snap open.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Nothing at all.”
For once in a very long time.
CHAPTER 21
Specter
My phone buzzingon the nightstand shatters the early morning peace. I’m already awake, just staring at the stunning man in my bed, but I’d rather the real world didn’t interrupt just yet. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s happening though.
Rolling over, I reach out and grab my phone, swiping the screen to unlock it.
Crestvale House: Meeting in ten in the dining room.
I rub my eyes, sitting up. Fuck. Something must be up for Shadow to call a meeting this early. I slide out of bed and shuffle to the bathroom to piss and brush my teeth, still slightly irritated. I wanted to wake up next to Cashmere and make sure he’s not freaking out like he did last time.
After throwing on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt, I quietly return to the bed, gazing down at him.
“I’m awake,” he says softly.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
“You didn’t.” He opens his eyes as he brushes his hair off his face. “Where are you going?”
“Shadow called a house meeting. I’m sure it won’t be long. Go back to sleep.”
Cashmere nods as I bend down and kiss his forehead. As Iback up, he grips my T-shirt to hold me in place. I tense, wondering if he’s going to shut down again.
