Somehow even sexier.
I watch as he wipes my skin, my thoughts pure chaos as I desperately try to reclaim who I am. I knew this would happen if I gave in. Specter knows how to disarm me. He can see beyond the fortress I’ve built and I’m not sure I like it.
He cleans the comforter and my leg where I found the mess, then he tosses the dirty rag onto the nightstand.
“Do you need a drink?”
I nod, not trusting my own voice.
“Water or something?”
I nod again, hoping he doesn’t press me for more. A slight smile tugs at his lips as he crosses the room to the mini fridge. He returns seconds later with a cold bottle of water, unscrewing the cap before handing it to me.
I take a large gulp, hoping the cool liquid will calm my racing pulse. What now? Is he going to be weird? Be done with me because he got what he wanted? Will he change now that he knows he has access to my body?
“Tea? I can brew some while you shower if you want.”
We’re not gonna talk about what just happened? Do I want to?
“Um…” I clear my throat. “I, um…” Yeah, I’ve got nothing.
“I could run you a bath too,” he says. “Maybe that would feel nice on your muscles.” He lifts my hand and kisses it softly. “Thank you.”
I blink rapidly. “For what?”
“Allowing my devotion.” He kisses my hand again, and I notice a sparkle in his eyes. “Did I bring my A-game?”
I mutter “Asshole” but my tone is surprisingly light.
“You are just as stunning as I knew you’d be. When you come, it’s like the night sky lights up, and fuck, baby, your taste is out of this world. I thought I was addicted before. I don’t know how to function now.”
Okay, yeah, we’re talking, but I don’t have a clue how to respond. I want to run away from his intensity and at the same time, soak it all up. I don’t know how to deal with these emotions. I’ve never felt them before.
“I’ll run the bath,” he says softly, sliding off the bed.
I nod, thankful for the reprieve. I kind of want to tell him about my aversion to wearing lingerie but then he might want to know more and I’m not sure I can explain it.
He appears in the doorway, smiling. “What’s on your mind?”
Blowing out a breath, I straighten my shoulders. I don’t have to admit everything. “Lingerie,” I mumble before clearing my throat. “I used to wear it but this one guy I dated he…” My words trail off as emotions I thought I buried resurface.
“He what?” Specter asks, his tone dark now.
“It was like a fetish for him and he made me feel really gross about it. Like he feminized me too much and I didn’t like that he wouldn’t stop. Since then I’ve had a hard time with it. I know I’m pretty and have feminine traits and I embrace that. But I’m still a man.”
“Of course. Lingerie isn’t gendered in my opinion.” His jaw ticks. “I’m sorry you were made to feel that way. Tell me who it is and I’ll fix it.”
I actually huff a laugh at that. “No thanks. It was a long time ago.”
“Would you like to try again sometime? With someone who would never treat you like something you’re not?”
Would I? He’s being so respectful too. “Maybe. I could try again.”
“Good.” He nods. “Your bath is almost ready.”
As he disappears in the bathroom again, I blow out a breath, wondering exactly how this all happened. Sex is simple. Transactional. All interested parties know pretty much what to expect.
But Specter flipped the script on me tonight. He changed the game, and I don’t know the rules anymore.
