“And why do you think it’s personal?”
“Because with the first incident, there was a stuffed hedgehog at my doorstep. I had a hedgehog that I slept with even into my teens. My parents gave it to me.” He exhales slowly, like he’s holding back tears. “One day, Bradley ripped its head off just to upset me. The only people who knew about the hedgehog were family members, but none of them hated me as much as Bradley did.”
“Okay, that might be a start, but why now? It’s been over a decade, right?”
Cashmere nods, still worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. “I don’t know. I don’t even know if it’s him, but it’s the only thing I can think of that makes any sense. If it wasn’t for the hedgehog, it could be anyone, but that’s so specific. It has to be someone who knows me.”
I nod, thinking over his words. “Thank you for telling me.”
“I had to.”
“You didn’t though. You could have generalized and left a lot out, but you trusted me with it, whether you know it or not.”
He neutralizes his expression. “Bradley Weir. That’s his name. I don’t know anything else about him.”
“It’s a start.”
We fall silent as the opera continues to play. Cashmere closes his eyes, a serene expression taking over the tortured one from minutes before.
“Music, dance, art,” he says softly. “They keep me alive. Remind me that there is beauty to be found and savored in this sometimes cruel existence. Some days, they’re the only things holding me together.” He opens his eyes, sitting up slightly. “Listen to this.” A smile tugs at his lips. “It’s breathtaking, and for just a little while, we can forget where it hurts.”
Fuck, he’s stunning. His face, of course, but I’m learning his mind is too. “I like it.”
“Really?”
I nod. “I like most kinds of music, and even though I’ve never listened to opera, it’s nice. Relaxing too.” Bravely, I reach for his hand, pressing it to my chest. “You are alive, and so fucking beautiful it hurts to look at you. You should only ever be surrounded by beauty and things that make you feel good. I can do that for you. Let me worship you. Let me show you my reverence.”
Cashmere pulls his hand away but surprises me by crawling closer, hovering just in front of my face. “Maybe I will let you.”
Please. “I want to kiss you so bad I can taste the desire.”
He raises his hand and brushes his fingers across my cheek. “I appreciate your enthusiasm for me.” Then he pats my cheek again like he did in the club, and I know it’s not going to happen. Not yet, at least.
“Your offer is being considered,” Cashmere says. Even though his tone is cool and unbothered, his eyes are like molten lava, and that’s good enough for me. I’m wearing him down little by little, and eventually, he’ll find out what I already know.
We were meant for each other.
CHAPTER 14
Colson
Studyingmy face in the bathroom mirror, I tap the still tender skin of my cheek. It’s better now. The swelling is gone and the color is fading. I can hide the rest with concealer.
After two days of being holed up in Specter’s bedroom, I almost feel like myself again. My hair is gloriously blown out, I’m moisturized, and I’ve been sleeping better than I have in years. Maybe having an unofficial bodyguard has more benefits than I thought.
I’m going to work tonight, and that thought comes with a lot of mixed emotions. I want to be back on the stage, Ineedit, but that also exposes me. I won’t be alone this time though. Specter will be there.
Straightening my shoulders, I smooth my hands over my hair, then exit the bathroom. Specter is sitting on the love seat, dressed in his ubiquitous black from head to toe, one leg crossed over the other, his head down as he scrolls on his phone.
He looks up right away, setting the phone down as his lips turn upward slightly. “You look amazing.”
“Thanks. A little makeup and I’ll be right as rain.”
“Right as rain?”
I laugh softly. “Something my mom used to say.”
“I’m glad you have so many amazing memories.”
