“Okay, okay.” I laugh, going to work on her other foot.
“So, what do you have going on tonight?” Melanie asks, eyes still closed.
“Nothing really,” I admit, cracking her toes.
She peeks an eye open. “Ow,” she says, but she’s smiling.
“Sorry.” I laugh. “I have been inside all day working on Cara’s song. I could use some sunlight, I think. I was waiting to see what you were up to.”
“What did you have in mind?” Melanie asks, sitting up and pulling her feet back. I immediately miss the physical contact.
“You want to go down to our beach?” I tilt my head at her.
“Our beach…” She lets her voice drop.
“You know, by the lighthouse,” I say, scooting closer to her and gripping her ankle so I can start rubbing her foot again.
Melanie’s lips spread into a slow smile. “I know where our beach is,” she says, her voice practically a whisper. “I just never thought of it asourbeach.”
I lick my lips. “And I’ve never thought of it as anything but.”
* * *
Fifteen minutes later,we’re trudging up the sandy path, Melanie with a blanket in her arms and a bag with sandwiches, and me with two guitar bags. We find our spot easily, a quiet nook between the dunes, the red and white lighthouse to our rear. It’s the same spot we’ve always come to. It’s the place where I first knew that my heart would always be tethered to Melanie’s.
It's a late June Saturday, so there are still beachgoers parked along the shoreline, kids playing at the water’s edge. The sun sits lower in the sky, and the air is comfortable. “Right here?” Melanie turns with a smile. I wonder if she is remembering prom night—the first night we claimed this place as our own.
“This looks like our spot.” I grin. I wait for her to spread the blanket out before setting our precious instruments toward the back of it. Then we sit near the front, kicking off our sandals. The sand is cooler at this time of day. Melanie hands me a sandwich and we sit, eating in comfortable silence. I’ve never been so comfortable with anyone before. There is no pressure to fill the silence with Melanie—it’s just us.
She picks up the trash from the sandwich wrapping and shoves it in the bag. Then she passes me a lemonade, and we both take a sip.
“This place has so many memories,” she says quietly. When I look over at her, she isn’t looking at me; she’s watching grains of sand sift through her fingers.
“It does,” I agree.
“Do you remember when we came here with Cara and Liam?” Melanie giggles as she says it, and our eyes meet. I laugh too, knowing exactly what memory she is referring to.
“Yeah, I do. And she all but suggested we move to Nashville together.” I pause. “She really had no idea we already planned to do that.” I huff out a nostalgic laugh.
For a moment, my words hang in the air. We sit still, looking at each other—perhaps both of us reflecting on everything we missed out on together. I cannot believe I missed out on knowing Melanie all this time. My chest constricts thinking about it. I’m about to tell her as much when she breaks the silence.
“Plans change, I guess,” Melanie says, offering me a half-hearted smile.
“I didn’t want them to,” I say, my voice gravelly.
Melanie doesn’t reply. She keeps her gaze focused on something down by the water. I get the sense she is holding back.
“I should have come back for you,” I say, angry with myself.
At this, Melanie turns and shakes her head. “Josh, it’s okay. I wouldn’t have had the courage to go anyway.”
“I don’t believe that for a second,” I say, and it comes out harsher than I mean it to. “You wanted it as bad as I did. To go there—to be a star.”
Melanie catches my gaze before quickly averting her glistening eyes. She sniffles. “All that’s in the past,” she mutters. She shifts, turning to face me. “Let’s hear this song.”
It’s clear Melanie doesn’t want to talk about what could have been. I can understand that to some degree. Being back here has made painful memories resurface for me, too. But it has also made me realize that I missed out on a whole life with the first girl I ever loved. Maybe we wouldn’t have ended up together, but maybe we would have. Now, I am struggling with letting things be or grabbing hold of them before I lose her again.
I pick up my guitar and begin to play. Melanie picks up the chord progression quickly and before long, we’re building on the melody with beautiful harmony. Everything inside me is warm and tingly.Thisis where I should be.
