A real-life monster.
That’s the part only the graduates of this stuff will understand. The Carver wasn’t the dark passenger—hello, Dexter reference—lurking within me and begging to be fed. That was Felix Darcey.
The Carverhad all the attention on him, but Felix Darcey wanted it. He wasstarvedfor it, in fact.
Who knows, maybe I even resented The Carver at times because of this.
Lemuel Love was the first person who sawmeand was enraptured. He’s never been anywhere near as fascinated by The Carver as he is by Felix Darcey.
I know he loves us both equally, but only because he loves me exactly as I am; damage, darkness, depravity and all.
Being freed from chains allows you to find the enjoyment in being tied down. I mean, no one wants tohave todo something… Human beings relish the freedom to choose.
And so, knowing I’mnotinvisible anymore has allowed me to really showcase just how invisible I can be…When I want to.
Slinking around a tree, I follow the voices on the other side, intentionally eavesdropping. Gaining intel, as I do.
The Ivory’s men are communicating over their walkie talkies—the ones with separate channels that Velle can’t hear. I’mpraying for any mention of Lem that could help me, but so far nothing. Just more routes and attack plans, andwe’re gonna hit ‘em hereandwe’re gonna hit ‘em hard blah blah freaking blah.
Jeez, guys. Come up with some new material already.
Clearly, their plans aren’t working as well as they’d hoped, since Velle and his team are very much still holding firm in their refusal to stand down or hand the prison back over to The Ivory.
My intention was never to be their eyes on the outside. It sort of just happened.
The most frustrating thing was that when Angel set me free and I ran out into the woods looking for Lem, he was already back in the mansion. But by the time I got out there, cartel men were swarming around thecrash site, as they call it—where the guard tower fell on the East Wing. They had the whole east side of the island covered, as well as the north, since that’s where the mansion is, meaning I couldn’t get back to him.
We probably missed each other by less than fifteen minutes… It was infuriating.
That was when I discovered that the west—specifically the southwest coast and the woods leading inward, toward the old armory—was open and completely unguarded. So that was where I set up shop.
It started purely out of self-preservation. There was no one over there, so I made a little campsite out of our spot—the large, flat rock between two of the tallest trees where Lem and I would occasionally have picnics and make out. This became mybase of operations, if you will. I just needed a place to hide out while I devised a plan, scoped out the situation, and figured out how to get Lem back.
I also knew that if Lem were able, he would look for me there.
The first of the Warden’s men I killed was just out of happenstance. I was scarfing down a granola bar when I heardfootsteps. The woods were muddy as shit from the storm, fallen trees and branches everywhere, meaning I was immediately filthy, and there were ample hiding spots. This camouflage worked well enough that the cartel men didn’t even see me. I sat quietly, blending into the trees and leaves as the first guy walked right out in front of me. So I slit his throat.
I mean, what else was I supposed to do?
When the other guy came to check on his friend, I stabbed the shit out of him a bunch of times—I might have gone at it a few seconds longer than necessary, because it had just beenso long.
Like that first drunken stop at Lucky Burger after dieting for fuckingmonths.
It felt great. Man, was Ihigh. I just sat there, breathing and chuckling, in a pool of blood and body parts for minutes.
But when I came to, I realized that I had their walkies. I could intercept their communications and maybe find out where Lem was. Perfect timing too, because I overheard something about the doctors being in the mansion.
I knew The Ivory was looking for me. I knew he wanted me back, for multiple reasons, but mainly to use me as leverage against Lemuel, and I’d briefly considered turning myself in if they’d just let Lem go free. But I also knew I could never trust Manuel Blanco.
No matter how much it killed me to think of what they might be doing to Lem, Ihadto hold out. Come up with a plan to get him back without them capturing me and escape so he could never get to either of us again.
That’s what I’ve been doing ever since. Using every opportunity to take out any cartel soldiers who venture west and just hoping for a break. Even the tiniest distraction that might get me close enough to the mansion to get inside and rescue Lemuel.
Like he did for me.
Being invisible does still have its advantages. As does being quiet and highly skilled with a knife.And I guess not caring if you’ve been covered in mud and human remains, and haven’t showered in weeks.
Velle knows I’m out here, so he has his guys run supplies out to me in drops every couple of days. Payment for being his hidden assassin, I suppose. We’ve passed a few notes back and forth, but all we’ve been able to verify so far is that Lem is alive and being held in the mansion.
