“I’ll make it right,” he promises.
“You can’t,” I say dully. What’s the point in pretending?
“What do you mean?”
I exhale. “Dr. Malone, I’m an administrative assistant, and you just told the Tates I was your girlfriend. And that it was a recent thing. So regardless of what you tell them now, they’ll assume we slept together but I couldn’t hold your interest.”
TEN
DREW
The look on Alexandra’s face hits me like a knife to the gut.
“There’s no reason for the Tates to think that,” I insist. “But I can tell them I lied about the relationship?—”
“Sure, and they’ll think you’re being a gentleman,” Alexandra says flatly. “And your office door was open through the whole conversation, so Celine probably heard it. So the story will spread through the hospital, and I’ll get a reputation as the secretary who slept with her boss.”
The knife in my gut twists. I’ve really screwed up. “I’ll talk to Celine. She won’t tell anyone.”
But Alexandra doesn’t look reassured, and maybe she’s right. I think I can trust Celine, but I can’t be completely sure. She’s friends with a lot of the other admin assistants, and for all I know, she’s already texted them.
“And there’s a chance it’ll leak through the Tates,” Alexandra points out. “At a fundraising event or something. Dr. Malone dating an admin assistant is pretty juicy gossip.”
She’s right. The Spring Fling gala is only a couple weeks away. I could ask the Tates not to mention it to anyone, but that would probably make them more curious.
And would they keep it quiet? Peter probably would, but Nina? I don’t know.
“Do you want to involve HR, then?” I ask. “Try to get ahead of it? It was my fault, Alexandra, and I’ll take responsibility.”
I can just imagine how that conversation would go.
You see, I lied and said I was in a relationship with my admin assistant. No, it wasn’t true. Yes, I’m aware it was an inappropriate thing to say. Yes, as the department chief I should have known better. No, I can’t explain how it happened.
Of course, I could explain how it happened. My lizard brain took over, and I spoke a fantasy out loud. Unfortunately, I don’t think that explanation would help.
But this is my fault, and if Alexandra wants me to humble myself in front of the HR department, I will.
“I don’t know,” Alexandra says slowly. “I really don’t want to lose this job.”
“Of course you won’t lose your job,” I tell her. “I’ll take responsibility, Alexandra.”
“I know,” she says. “But . . .”
“But?” I prompt her.
She takes a deep breath. “Well, you’re the chief of surgery, and I’m an admin assistant who’s worked here for less than a month. So even if you say it’s your fault . . .” she sighs. “People may still see me as the problem. I’ll be the girl who led you astray.”
And the guilt hits me like a wave. Alexandra isn’t wrong. Some people will always blame the woman, regardless of the circumstances. And there’s a huge power imbalance here; as she aptly pointed out, I’m the chief of surgery and she’s a recently hired assistant.
She won’t lose her job over this, I’ll make sure of that. But she’s employed by the hospital, not by me, and this could still bea black mark on her file. Down the road, if HR can find another reason to fire her, they might.
“And now Celine’s probably noticing that we’ve been in here for the past ten minutes with the door closed,” Alexandra points out.
Fuck, she’s right. And if I open the door, Celine will be able to hear our conversation. I could ask Celine to leave to give us some privacy, but that would defeat the purpose of opening the door.
“Let’s go get coffee,” I suggest.
“Sure,” Alexandra agrees dully.
