“I’m sorry. I deserved that. I just don’t like thinking of you with any other men.”
“Says the guy who has his photo in the tabloids with a different woman every week.”
He straightens. “I’m not with all those women. Don’t believe the tabloids.”
“You’ve been with enough of them. I’ve seen.”
“Hey.” Ryder pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me.
“I’m suffocating.” My words are muffled into his shirt.
He loosens his hold. “I’m sorry I started this. I’m a jealous bastard. I don’t own your past.”
He doesn’t own my past, but does he want a part of my present? Or future?
Ugh. The morning after can be so confusing.
I feel his lips in my hair, and then he lets me go.
“We should talk about what happened between us.”
I try to appear casual, like this is no big deal. “What about it?” I ask, blasé-like. Then ruin it by adding, “Please don’t say you regret it.”
A muscle in his jaw clenches. “I’m so damn afraid of fucking things up with you, Daisy.”
“So you regret it?”
“No.” He pulls back so he can look me in the eye. “Never think that. I couldn’t regret last night.Ever.But I don’t want to make a wrong move here. You’re not just any girl. You’reyou. You’ve been a part of my life for the last decade. Your brother is one of my best friends. We can’t cut each other from our lives if this doesn’t work out. And I would never want to. Any other girl, it wouldn’t matter. But what happens between us matters, Daisy. The last thing I want is to end up hurting you.”
I hate that he always assumes I’m the one who would get hurt. That I’m the one who’s always pining for him. He’s right, of course. But he doesn’t need to know that. I’m tired of him thinking that I’m some vulnerable girl who needs to be protected, like I was a decade ago.
“What makes you thinkyouwill hurtme?” I ask. “Did you ever think that maybe it’s you who would get hurt? If anything, us having sex would probably help me get over you faster.”
“What are you talking about?”
“It’s true. When I get together with a guy, I always lose interest. In fact, I think the reason my crush on you lasted as long as it did is because we never hooked up. If we had…pfft. I’d have been over you.”
“That makes no sense.”
I shrug. He’s right. I was just bullshitting at first. But the more I think about it, the more I realize there might be some truth to it.
“All I know is I don’t want to chase after a guy who isn’t sure what he wants. Not anymore. I want someone who’s all in. Who’s willing to chaseme,” I say.
His gaze is intent. “Good. You absolutely deserve that, Daisy.”
I’m not sure what I expected him to say. But it wasn’t that. The fight goes out of me.
He presses a kiss on my forehead. It’s gentle. And it illuminates the flaws in my theory that spending more time together will make me lose interest in Ryder.
“Come on,” he says, gruffly. “I don’t want to leave, but I’m afraid Brendan’s going to be banging on the door next.”
With his hand on the small of my back, Ryder directs me into the hallway and down the stairs because we can’t spend the whole day in his bedroom, especially not with guests. Archie clambers after us.
But when we make it to the bottom of the steps, Ryder’s hand drops. He walks into the living room toward his brother and a woman, who are inspecting the fireplace, while I hang back. The woman turns. She’s extremely well put-together. The Tory Burch shop won’t go under anytime soon on her watch. When she sees Ryder, she squeals and runs toward him, giving him an enthusiastic hug.
Ryder’s smile is wide, and my heart tilts sideways. That’s the smile he givesme.
“Shel Bell,” he says. “It’s been too long.”
