“Justice,” she said. “Can’t you see?”
Everything he’d done was to hold on to a desperate idea of peace. And it had consumed him, at the cost of everything; the great tragedy was that his desperation for peace was the thing that now led to war.
“We cannot succeed.”
“Then you are a coward.”
“‘Look for a big tree when you want shelter,’” he said. “You have to know the truth of who we serve.”
“Our family’s killers?”
“Peace is more important than a grudge.”
“You’re a fossil,” Kai said.
“Seikiyo spared you. You owe your life to him.”
“What life?” She shifted her weight. “Life in his cage?”
Yora shook his head. Supporting Seikiyo would only enable him to take dictatorial power. Standing against him would lead to countless deaths.
“There is no good answer,” he said.
“What about me?” She was facing him now, concern, and doubt, on her features. “Are you not sworn to protect me?”
“I am also sworn to protect the realm…”
“So what’s more important?” she asked. “Duty, or your flesh and blood?”
“You intend to stand against them?”
“Ihaveto stand against them. He controls everything. That’s what this is all about – that’s what my fatherdiedfor.”
“And who would you have instead? If we remove the Keishi from power, who would take their place? You?”
Kai breathed. “I am the heir to our family…”
“I’m asking you: to defeat a tyrant, what areyouwilling to do? You say you want to stop a dictator, fine – but you’ll have to put something in their place. And how many will pay the cost? How many lands and temples and homes will be burned? I’ve lived through that, and I know, better than you do, what the reality of it will bring.”
She was silent for so long he thought she was going to leave. Then she spoke, tears in her eyes. “I thought… I always thought that when I got older, things would become clear. I’m supposed to know what to do… but I don’t. I never know what I’m supposed to do. I can’t keep carrying this weight. And I… I don’tknow. How can I be expected to inherit our entire clan, how can I lead them? I can’t even make my voice be heard at court.”
“The court is a show these days,” said Yora. “Surely you’ve noticed that.”
“I’m no good with a sword or a bow… I can’t ride a horse at a gallop. I don’t evenlikehorses…”
“Being a good ruler is not just about cutting off heads,” Yora said. “Though some may have you think otherwise. It’s about understanding people. You might not be as strong as Sora’in, but you are as smart, andyou may well become as wise. You know the economics of the capital. You know how to balance a ledger. You know the customs of the court better than anybody because you grew up among it, yet apart; you can see the lies they hide behind their painted veils.Theseare things that will help you, Kai, not how fast you swing a sword.”
He wanted her to take comfort in what he said, but she looked as unsure as ever. “You’ll always have warriors to fight for you,” he said. “So have them swing the swords, loose the arrows. It’ll be up to you to make sure the taxes come in, make sure your people are happy and not suffering from plague or famine. These are the things you know how to do.”
She asked him: “Will you support me?”
The reflection of the moon danced before them on the river. The murmur of the stream mixed with nightbirds in the air. He watched the flowing water, dappled in the night, and heard the sound of the current over stones, each the size of a hand. They’d walked to the other end of the bridge, and now he bent to pick one up, smooth, cold as ice, shining in the light of the evening. He sighed.
“Everyone knows you’ve been a loyal servant of this family,” Kai said. “Please.”
“I have always been a loyal servant of this family,” Yora said sadly, and tossed the stone into the stream.
CHAPTERFIFTEEN
