Which happened to be Shep, Dimitri, and Kai, an unusual trio if I’d ever seen one. America’s golden son, a scary arms dealer, and a man who was barely taller than the kids themselves. It was more than amusing to watch, which was what I found Rafael and the others doing where they lounged. Zac and Cooper were manning the grills with East directing; Benoit and Theo were smoking and probably gossiping by the pool; King and Lucien were holding court at the table of appetizers, the latter keeping a watchful eye over his husband and kids with a soft smile on his face.
I rounded the table where Rafael was laughing at something Lachlan said, which, knowing his mouth, was probably inappropriate and something I’d want to slap him upside the head for later.
“Tell me he’s not filling your head with filth,” I said, leaning down to kiss Rafael’s temple and hand him a glass of sauvignon blanc. “You might need something stronger than this.”
Rafael smiled as I took the seat beside him. “You say that like I haven’t heard worse.”
“Maybe, but you’re not required to absolve them of their many sins anymore.”
“What, a man can’t tell a dirty joke without needing to say a few hail Marys?” Lachlan shook his head and took a sip of his whiskey on ice.
I arched a brow. “Nothing in that twisted brain of yours is just ‘dirty,’ you deviant. Keep your sins out of my husband’s ear.”
“Oh, come on, he laughed.”
“Being polite, I’m sure, which”—I turned to Rafael—“you really don’t have to do. In fact, if you want to throw your wine in his face at any point, I fully support that.”
“The abuse.” Lachlan clutched at his chest and stood up from his chair. “If I’m such a monster, I guess I should go…” He trailed off as one of Theo and Shep’s twins ran toward the table,and he quickly scooped up the toddler and held him upside down. “And gobble up a little kid.” Shrieks of laughter rang out as he carried him off back to the others, and I grinned as I watched the kids try to tackle the newest monster.
Rafael took a sip of his wine and threaded his fingers through mine, his gaze on the wild scene playing out. There was a soft smile on his face, a look of utter contentment that made my heart clench. Sometimes it was hard to believe I could be this happy, that Rafael chose this life with me every day. That he’d wanted it so much he’d let me put a gold band on his ring finger and never, ever took it off.
I brought our joined hands up between us and held them against my cheek, still watching him. It was overwhelming the way I wanted to give him the world, anything he asked for and even what he didn’t. I’d always felt a little selfish when it came to Rafael, not wanting to share him with anyone after being without him for so long.
But what if…
“Are you thinking about it?” I asked quietly.
The sides of his mouth drew up even more, and then he looked at me, curiosity in his eyes. “Are you?”
“I think”—I kissed the back of his hand—“that you would make an incredible dad.” He’d already been an incredible reverend, and a mentor to many of the teens in the city who looked to him for advice and direction. It was such a natural fit for Rafael, the next step in our relationship. If only?—
“You would too,” he said. “I know you’re scared, worried you wouldn’t be good at it, but no one has a bigger heart than you, Alessio. No one has more love to give. Plus, you’d be able to track their every move, and that would make me feel a lot better.”
I laughed out loud then, because he wasn’t wrong about that. No child in our extended family would ever be out of my reach,and I was more than happy to keep tabs on the twins and Lucien and Kai’s kids as they got older.
But having one of our own…
God, it was scary as hell to think about. But shit, Theo had done it, and he was an amazing dad. And any child would be the luckiest in the world to have Rafael as theirs.
I smiled, kissed the back of Rafael’s hand, and nuzzled it again as peals of laughter echoed off the stone terrace.
“Hmm. A little Rafael Junior with bright blond hair,” I mused.
“I don’t know, I think it’s a missed opportunity if they don’t have your hair. And I’d love to see you with a little girl.”
I almost choked on my wine, coughing into my fist as Rafael laughed. “A girl? What makes you think I’d know the first thing about raising a girl?”
Rafael gently ran his fingers down my cheek. “You have a way about you. It’s quietly protective, thoughtful, and gentle.”
“Gentle?”
“Yes. You’re patient, understanding, and capable of disappearing any boyfriends—or girlfriends—we don’t approve of.”
My eyes widened a fraction. “Okay, I’m banning you from talking to Lachlan on your own from here on out. He’s definitely having an influence on your state of mind.”
“I’m merely stating the pros of being married to the most talented technocrat around when it comes to having children.”
“Uh huh.” I took his hand and brought it to my lips. “But you really have thought about it?”
