Tears welled in her eyes. “But?”
Hawk touched her chin with his finger, turning her face back to him. “It’s okay. You’re okay. You just imagined it was him.” Hawk turned his face to his brother. “Give us a minute.”
Lincoln left.
Hawk waited for the door to close before he turned back to her. “Flashbacks, waking nightmares, it’s part of PTSD for some people. Trust me. I know exactly what you’re going through because of my military service. You’ve been through a lot. It’s natural that your brain is trying to make sense of everything and also trying to protect you. I get it.”
She touched her forehead to his. “Of course you do. But…that’s never happened to me before, seeing things that aren’t there.”
“I know. I’m sorry this is happening to you. But you don’t need to be scared. I’m here. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
She kept her head dipped, trying to collect herself, then realized she had her legs wrapped around Hawk’s waist, he had his huge hand on one of her ass cheeks, holding her up, and they were in a very intimate position. Her head shot up and their eyes locked. “Um.” He was so very close to her. Closer than anyone had gotten in a long time. Too long.
“Yeah,” Hawk breathed out. “You feel really good in my arms.”
She didn’t know what possessed her, but she closed the distance and hugged him like a monkey wrapped around a tree trunk.
His arms wrapped around her and tightened. “I’ve got you, Lucky.”
“I’m really starting to believe that.”
“Scared?”
“Hopeful.”
Hawk rubbed his cheek against hers. “Me, too.”
She sighed out her contentment, but that only punctuated how much her chest hurt from moving her shoulder.
The nurse was supposed to bring a brace for her to wear home and keep on for the next week or so.
“What’s wrong?” Hawk leaned his head back, so he could look her in the eyes.
“Shoulder.”
“You’re supposed to be resting and not moving your arm, so that wound can heal.” Hawk took the few steps to the bed and leaned over to deposit her back onto it. His hand slid from her ass along her thigh to her knee in a slow glide that made a thousand nerve ending light up like Christmas lights, warm and lively. Need danced along her skin and settled between her thighs.
“Um. Yeah.” She blushed from her chest to the roots of her hair. “That was…nice.”
Hawk brushed his fingers along her cheek. “You’re even prettier when you blush.”
Her face heated even more. “I look like I feel. Gross. I desperately need a shower. I don’t know how you can stand being this close to me.”
He gently took her calf and pulled her leg down flat on the bed, then smoothed her hospital gown down her legs. “I find myself unable to stay away. You’re hurt, but you’re alive. That’s all that matters to me.”
“I’m alive because of you. Thank you for finding me, for saving me.”
“You saved me first.”
She shook her head. “No. You did that all on your own.”
“Not true. You helped in all those little ways you reminded me I wasn’t alone even in the darkest part of the night when I was surrounded by ghosts and the things I couldn’t change. I’d read one of your notes, the books you’d leave me with those happy endings, the mundane crosswords and word searches that gave my brain a break from the past. And always there was something tempting in the fridge that made me want to eat even when I had no appetite. For food or life.”
“I just…know what it’s like to feel like you’re alone.”
“I didn’t realize you’re more alone than I am. I’m sorry about that. As much as you gave to me and I gave to you, I should have done better at being your friend, because that’s how I felt about you.”
“And now?” She didn’t mean to push, but she needed to know if he felt the way she felt.
