“I know. But I still need to say it to you anyway. Please.”
Brooke’s shoulders went slack. “Fine.”
Susanne went to Brooke, hugged her from behind with her chin on Brooke’s shoulder. “I love you. I’m here for you. Always.”
Brooke turned and hugged her mom for a long moment, then stepped back. “Love you, too. I’ll call you when I get to school.” Brooke’s eyes glassed over.
Cody’s chest went tight. He hated that he was the reason for this early goodbye and that it felt much heavier and more sorrowful than any other time Brooke went back to school, because it felt like a last goodbye, even if he knew Brooke would always stay in touch with her mom.
Brooke walked out the door with her stuff.
Susanne touched his shoulder just before he walked out after her. The simple gesture meant a lot because Susanne knewhe caused this, but she hadn’t turned away from him. He appreciated that so much because she was the only mother he’d ever known even if he was grown when she came into his life. He never wanted to disappoint or hurt her. He’d done both.
Brooke stowed her things in the backseat and slipped into the front.
Cody took his seat behind the wheel of his car and drove them off the ranch and onto the main road.
Wholly aware of her and how close they were to each other, he tried not to notice the pair of silky white legs tucked into an impossibly tight, and short, jean skirt beside him. Tried and failed. The memory of those legs wrapped around him just days ago set his heart to racing and his body swelling. He tried equally hard not to notice the distant look in her green eyes.
He tried to think of what to say to make this right, but now that he had her all to himself, he couldn’t think of any words that would fix this.
I don’t want you to go!
She had to know at least that.
Distracted by her, this aching distance between them, he missed a yellow light, slammed on the brakes, and skidded to a stop just over the crosswalk line.
Someone honked their horn, and he swore under his breath and tried to slow his racing heart with a deep breath.
She glared at him as she fell back into her seat after being thrown forward, the seatbelt locking tightly against her breast and shoulder. “Pay attention to the road,” she snapped. “I’d like to get there in one piece.”
Brooke crossed her arms under her breasts and went back to ignoring him.
He wished he had the hours it would take to drive her all the way back to school instead of the twenty-minute drive that wasalmost over. He needed more time to thaw things out between them, so they could have an honest talk.
But that wasn’t going to happen with his phone going off every twenty seconds with a text from Kristi. The woman he’d chosen instead of the one beside him.
His life was royally fucked.
“Say something. Say anything,” he demanded, hoping she’d start and he’d know how to make her forgive him before he had to put her on a bus and watch her leave.
She didn’t say a word and went back to staring out the window, so still and controlled.
He hated that their close friendship had turned into this crushing distance and silence between them.
She loved him. She had since she was ten years old. She was the one person he could talk to who really listened. She was the one person he could count on to keep a secret. He trusted her without reservation. She told him the truth, even if he didn’t want to hear it. She had a way of getting past his sometimes volatile temper with her quiet demands that he stop acting like a jerk and talk to her about what really bothered him. He hadn’t realized until this moment how much he depended on her constant nurturing spirit in his life.
The light turned green, and he continued through the intersection and thought about the night they’d made love. Everything had been perfect. If he couldn’t have that back, he wanted what he’d always thought would remain. Their friendship.
He’d spent the better part of last night knocking back four doubles, trying to convince himself he wasn’t in love with her. It was just lust. That’s all it was, he lied to himself. What they’d shared wasn’t special. He’d reduced their night together down to the bare basics of sex enjoyed by two people.
He wasn’t feeling reluctant to let her go back to school. He wasn’t feeling possessive and hating the idea she might find someone at college to take to her bed. He absolutely didn’t have any tender feelings toward her other than friendship.
What a fucking crock of shit!
He wondered how long he could lie to himself and everyone else. He wondered if one day he’d wake up and believe the lie so he could get through one second of the day without thinking about her.
The headache pounding behind his eyes had more to do with the situation than the hangover from the whiskey he’d drowned in last night, trying to forget he’d ever laid a hand on Brooke.
