I stop, and staring at the ocean, I let my tears fall.
I need more strength, Lord.
Much more.
Chapter 17
Easton
“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay?” Harlow asks as I walk her to the front door.
She’s asked me the same question every night for the past nine days, and I appreciate it. Giving her a smile, I nod. “I’ll call if we need you.”
“Okay. Have a good night.”
I shut the door behind her and head back to the living room. Even though Rachel sleeps most of the time, I turned her bed so she can see the TV.
Lainey’s watching a fantasy movie while Nova’s making coffee.
I sit down on the armchair I’ve placed next to the bed and take hold of Rachel’s hand. Leaning back, I let out a sigh while I stare at my sister.
“Here you go,” Nova says, holding a mug out to me.
I take the beverage and give her a grateful smile.
Nova goes to sit down beside Lainey again, and while she drinks her coffee, she draws patterns on my niece’s back.
I sip on the beverage, my attention divided between my sister and the movie. Every now and then, I catch myself staring at Nova, her mere presence bringing me a sense of calm I desperately need.
Rachel’s fingers stir in mine, and my eyes snap to her face. She looks very weak and slowly blinks.
When I lean closer, she barely manages to whisper, “T ... im ... e.”
“Nova!” I snap.
While Lainey turns off the TV, Nova comes to press a kiss to Rachel’s cheek, and I hear her whisper, “I love you, Rach.” She gives her another kiss, then makes space so Lainey can stand beside her mother.
Nova places her hands on Lainey’s shoulders as my niece whispers, “I love you, Mommy.”
I set the coffee down on a table, and moving to sit beside Rachel on the bed, I lean over her. Staring at her with every ounce of love I feel for her, I say, “I remember the first time Mom and Dad brought you home. God, I was so happy to finally have a sibling.” She blinks slowly. “You were everything I wished for.”
When she blinks again, I know it’s for the last time.
Lifting my head, I glance at Nova, who immediately steers Lainey back to the couch. My goddaughter curls against her aunt’s side and begins to cry silently.
I look at Rachel again, drinking in her peaceful features for close to an hour before she exhales, and as her final breath leaves her, tears fall from my eyes.
Every memory I have of Rachel flashes through my mind, and I keep staring at her face, which looks like she’s sleeping.
I suck in a deep breath as I move my fingers to her pulse, and not feeling anything, I pull my phone out of my pocket and dial Harlow’s number.
“Should I come back?” she asks as she answers the call.
My voice is hoarse as I say, “Yes.”
“Okay.”
I end the call and drop the device on the armchair before looking at Rachel again. I brush my hand over her hair, and leaning forward, I press a kiss to her forehead. “I’ll miss you.”
