I still didn’t get what that was supposed to mean. Ready for what? And who the hell was he to decide what I was ready for? I kicked a pinecone unfortunate enough to be nearby and watched it sail into the trees. I was over it. Really. Another pinecone fell victim to how over it I was. A rustle in the bushes followed my latest kick, and a small robin fell out with an outragedsquawk!The little guy shook his head, ruffled his feathers, and tried to fly away, but one of his wings wouldn’t bend correctly.
“Oh gods,” I cursed. “Please tell me I didn’t hurt an innocent forest creature.”
I reached for him, intent on checking him over, but he hopped out of reach, the broken wing dragging alongside him.
“Come ‘ere, baby. I only want to help,” I cooed in a low voice. Strange. Animals usually loved me, even when hurt. Granted, I had never been the one to cause the damage before. My guilt grew, and I doubled my efforts. He sure was nimble, even with a severe injury. Slowly, I followed him away from the quad and toward the deeper forest. We were still within eyesight of everyone else, and I was sure I looked all kinds of stupid duck-waddling behind this bird with my arms stretched out.
“I’m not going to hurt you…again,” I muttered. “Let me help you.”
I pushed a strand of my power at him, but couldn’t make a connection. Just like that cat by the science building, there was no animal chatter in my mind. Intense reactions like pain were nearly impossible to ignore, they screamed out at me even when I wasn’t trying to connect. Maybe this was an old injury. It was possible his wing healed like this from an old break and my pinecone only frightened him from the bushes.
But that didn’t fully explain why I couldn’t connect to his mind and calm him. With a small burst of speed, I cut him off from the forest and herded him back to open ground.
“I can’t catch you in there, buddy. And I really am trying to make you feel better.” Anyone else might feel silly speaking to a bird like they could comprehend, but even without magick that was one thing animals were good at, understanding the intent behind the words.
“Is this some kind of nature pilates or have you finally cracked?”
Rani’s sparkly purple toes appeared in front of me, passing directly through the injured robin. Before I could do more than gasp, the image of the little bird vanished in thin wisps of smoke–like it was never there at all. Oh my gods. Ihadfinally cracked. Who hallucinated a whole-ass bird?
“But seriously, babe,” Rani continued. “What are you doing down there?”
I quickly stood and brushed imaginary dirt off my legs. Another quick glance around showed no injured animals, birds or otherwise.
“There was a robin…” I started, but there was no way to finish that sentence without sounding completely mental.
Rani took pity on me and let it slide. The gods knew it wasn’t the weirdest thing she’d seen me do. She caught me running from one end of the dorm to the other on multiple occasions. And one time, she watched as I sprinted from my bed in the middle of the night to the bus depot and back with a stopwatch in my hand. She bought my excuse of training for a triathlon, but that didn’t make my actions any less weird. Rani looped her arm through mine and made a beeline back across the quad toward the Commons.
“Tell me what the rules are for tonight,” she demanded, and I rolled my eyes.
“Study at the library until my eyes cross,” I replied. Really, we didn't have to go over it.
“And?”
I sighed. “And then come straight back to the dorm.”
“To do what?”
“It’s not that bad, Rani,” I grumbled. “I know how to—”
“To do what?”
She pulled me to a stop just outside the Commons and glared at me. All business. The delectable smells that escaped each time the doors opened made my mouth water. I was starving. My stomach clenched on a wave of nausea when it hit me. How long had it been since I fed? Not on food but on dreams. It was definitely before I got to school, possibly on one of the buses here. That was far too long. No wonder my powers weren’t working and I was seeing imaginary animals.
My nausea grew as the panic set in. I risked a flare-out or loss of control if I didn’t fix this soon. I needed to find a sleeping human; tonight. My gaze slid to Rani. The thought of feeding off her, now that I knew her, was revolting. Just the thought made me feel slimy and gross. No, it would have to be a stranger. Perhaps someone in the library.
“That’s it. I’m going to cancel tonight.”
I snapped out of it and shook my head. “I’m all good, I swear.” Her side-eye said she was less than convinced, but I couldn’t risk her being in the dorm tonight if I didn’t find someone to feed from. “Iswear. I will go straight to sleep. No wallowing over boys allowed. Even though I still argue that imagining detailed ways to dismember someone falls firmly in the “I’m over it” category.”
It took most of dinner and the walk to the library to convince her I wasn’t going to burn the dorm down by lighting candles and summoning demons to drag Kai to the fiery pits of hell. I managed to forget about my infuriating TA, even while completing the worksheets he sent back with notes. A true feat of strength. The library didn’t close for another two hours, and I hoped to find someone passed out deep in the stacks.
My little study desk was tucked away in the back, behind rows and rows of dark aisles and empty group rooms. The perfect amount of privacy. Humans couldn’t see anything when I fed, but it would look unusual for me to be standing over someone and touching them for however long it took to fill up. I leaned back in my chair, telling myself I deserved a little rest while I waited. Just a couple minutes. I’d rest my eyes, and then I’d go hunting.
The legs of my chair tipped back a little too far, and I jerked awake to the feeling of falling. Straightening the chair, I rubbed at sandpaper eyes and looked around. The library was darker than usual, only the emergency lights kept the shadows at bay.Shit. I scrambled to pack my bag, not caring if I bent my notebooks. How late was it?
Ears strained for any small sound, I worked my way back to the front doors. Heavy snoring echoed out from one of the group rooms on my left. A janitor sat fast asleep at the table, head in his arms, and headphones on loud enough for me to hear the classical music escaping into his ears. I’d get in trouble if I were caught in the library after hours, but I still needed to feed. Sometimes, things had a way of working out, and I wasn’t going to waste this opportunity.
On silent feet, I crept into the room. He couldn't hear me, but humans had a sixth sense about movement and a way of knowing when someone watched them. Even when sleeping. I kept my gaze on the table and observed the janitor out of the corner of my eye. A small piece of exposed skin, that’s all I needed. Reaching out, I placed a gentle fingertip on his elbow, the rough skin less sensitive and safer to touch.
