That is, until the instant he was free and my trauma finally won out.
I jumped up and away from the autumn fae so fast that my vision blackened, and if a stark-still Luca hadn’t been there, I would’ve toppled over in a heartbeat. Side-leaning against the massive stallion, I clenched my eyes closed against the deep, shallow breaths of raw terror threatening to topple me over.
A distant part of me knew I should’ve been helping Endymion staunch the bleeding, but in that moment, Father Death could’ve come to claim him, and I wouldn’t have been able to so much as open my eyes, let alone help.
Lady Time’s power was lost on me as I meandered back to myself.
Slowing breaths.
Head resting against Luca.
Warmth radiating off him.
Fingers idly stroking his side.
Leaden lids finally opening.
The verdant forest coming back into view.
A first, deep breath.
“Nyleeria,” Endymion said my name with a whispered gentility that seemed to unlock the last shackles holding me hostage. Iblinked up at him, eyes burning. His features softened in knowing. “I know this is the last thing you want right now, but we need to take care of that arrow. Do you think you can let me take it out for you?”
“Okay,” I rasped, exhaustion cloyingly heavy as I shifted so that I was facing Luca’s flank. Tilting forward on my feet, I pressed my hands against him. Chest tightening again, I braced myself.
Endymion stepped behind me. I wasn’t sure how far the arrow shaft protruded from my back, but as I heard him tear another strip of fabric to protect his hands the same as he’d done for me, I knew it was enough for him to get a decent grip.
He took a moment to get into position.
A breath passed. Then another. Then another.
Before I could ask what was wrong, he said, “I have to put a hand on you to make sure you don’t move when I pull it out.”
“Just make it quick,” I said, unable to muster any gratitude for his consideration.
His massive warrior hand pressed firm against my back, and for once, my body was too wrung out to resist his closeness. Now steadied, I braced myself, but if I was being honest, I wasn’t entirely sure if it was against the pain I was about to feel or how fragile I felt under his supporting touch.
A heartbeat later, he pulled.
Chapter 10
Great Responsibility
We’d staunched the bleeding with the spare clothing in my rucksack before heading back to the Summer Palace on foot—Endymion reassuring me that Luca’s stasis was temporary and he’d be fine.
He’d tried to strike up a conversation several times over the past hour, but I hadn’t engaged; too lost in a cavern of thoughts to pay mind to anything outside its dark confines. Though, that didn’t stop me from sensing his worried gaze.
My heart seemed to ache as much as the seeping wound at my shoulder, but despite all that, I fought like hell to grapple my spiraling emotions. They wouldn’t serve me moving forward.
One thing was certain; I couldn’t keep living at the mercy of others.
I needed to figure out how to control this ancient power everyone hunted me for before its fickle nature got me killed. If it was as powerful as everyone claims it to be, then I’d turn myself into a weapon and obliterate anyone who threatened me again.
I’d found myself in the center of a political minefield, myignorance chafing with every step I took westward to the palace. I needed to understand this realm. More importantly, I needed a plan.
This was no longer about saving my siblings. This was bigger than me. Bigger than them.
Truth was, a time was coming when I’d have to choose a side in this simmering war, and with the outcome apparently resting on my shoulders—or trapped within me—my ignorance horrified me.
