“Nyleeria, what happened out there?” His voice was soft, but strained as if he was trying to hold back hurt, possibly anger. “Thaddeus won’t tell me anything.”
Silence fell as I let my tired eyes rest, trying to dispel the whirlwindstill turning in my head. I knew Tarrin desperately needed to know, but I couldn’t relive it right now—possibly ever.
“Tarrin?”
His response was instant, alert: “Yes?”
“I need your help.”
“What is it? Are you okay?” His eyes darted across my body, searching for any sign of injury.
“Can you take me to the river?” It was an odd request, but something within me felt called to it, like a wild beast drawn to a watering hole in a drought.
Tarrin raised a brow but didn’t question further. Instead, he stood up and held out a hand. It wasn’t the first time he’d obliged one of my requests without forcing me to explain, and it was possibly my favorite trait of his.
“I can carry you,” Tarrin said, hovering. His words were soft, questioning.
My arm twined through his, I relied heavily on his sturdy frame as we languidly crawled across the estate. Despite my drained energy making each step difficult, there was a serene comfort in the warmth of the perfect summer day combined with the soft blades of grass caressing my bare feet.
“I know.” I squeezed his hand and leaned my head against him. “Thank you.”
Tarrin didn’t push. Didn’t say another word. Just patiently walked with me, stealing worried glances from time to time. I was grateful for his steady presence and grace.
The sight of the river was like a balm to my frayed nerves, pulling me toward it. Without a second thought, I released Tarrin’s arm and strode into its embrace, the water hungrily lapping at my skirt until its weight insistently tugged downstream.
As the water rose to my waist, I pivoted, positioning my back against the current. The solid assurance of two rocks beneath my feet anchored me, and I surrendered to the river’s might, reclining against its invisible hands. Relaxing fully into the flow, I allowed the water’s healing song to caress my aching bones—my crestfallen soul.
“Thank you,” I breathed to the Mother as she enveloped me.
Strands of my hair swirled and twined in the water’s embrace, tickling my skin with its gentle caress. Every passing droplet spoke in gentle hushes as they held me up, like the river itself could soothe that sacred and ancient part of me that had been violated.
I searched for that part of me—the one I’d recklessly laid bare today. She felt as I did, weary but stirring once more.
“I’m sorry.” The whispered words were lost amid the babbling current.
Water poured from me as I approached a weary-eyed Tarrin, standing steadfast on the rocky shoreline. Unable to restrain himself any longer, he lent me a hand. I was grateful for his help, as each land-bound step had the sodden weight of my skirt threatening to pull me downstream.
“Here,” Tarrin said and led me up a small slope.
I was surprised to find that I followed him with ease, my strength slowly returning.
As we crested the short incline, a vast slab of slate greeted us. Its smooth, glistening surface promised heat as it captured the sun, a faint, colorless wave emanating from it.
Just as the coolness of the river had filled me, so did the heat as the soles of my feet soaked up what the boulder offered. Still sopping wet, the water pooled at my feet before meandering down invisible pathways and returning back to the river.
I lowered myself beside Tarrin. He didn’t say, or demand, anything, but merely took me in, his look questioning but gentle, silently asking if I was okay. I knew then that he’d accept if I kept the memories to myself, and something in that knowledge made mewant to tell him. Until that moment, I hadn’t decided if I’d talk about it with anyone—including Thaddeus.
“I found a way to let Thaddeus draw from my power,” I explained.
Tarrin’s eyes widened in surprise, but he remained silent.
I looked toward the river, not seeing what was in front of me as my mind stepped back into the memory.
“It worked,” I offered. “It strengthened him.” The cracking of the pillars rang in my ears.
I churned the details over again and again in my mind.
“I could hear him,” I said, more to myself than Tarrin. “His silent commands…his spells.” The memory repeated itself. “Tarrin,” I asked tentatively, meeting his gaze, “what doesmaiattormean?”
