They stare at me in utter horror. “How?”
“I don’t know. Thankfully, the curse has taken hold only a handful of times, mostly related to my soul-fated, but each time—especially recently—my interval as the beast has grown successively longer.” I shudder out a breath and continue. “The longest period was the most recent, and prior to that, when she gave herself to the king of Oryndhr. So if I ever truly,fullybond with my soul-fated, or fall in love with her, there’s a chance that the change...”
“Will be permanent.” Ve stares at me, an aghast expression on their flawless face. “You can’t feelanyemotion at all?”
“Nothing extreme. I can find some mild pleasure in conversation, food, sparring, and other innocuous activities without change, but anything chaotic, any intense emotion, and I’m lost for days and now for weeks at a time.” I pause. “There’s another thing. Previously, my consciousness remained entirely separate. Now, there are tethers.”
“Tethers?”
“I see and hear the manticore. Almost like a spectator.”
They tilt their head thoughtfully, a myriad of feelings crossing their face as they consider what I’ve shared. “I suspect your beast has no familiarity with your human side, which translates to no real power over your magic in that form?” They scowl when I nod. “Does the Starkeeper know all this?”
“About the curse, not about the soul-fated bond,” I say, “or about the possible evolution of our magic once bonded.”
Ve approaches, their eyes boring through my soul. “Why tell me now?”
Clenching my jaw, I wave my arm. “I know you and the other Royal Stars are aware something is coming. The rot that Saru chose eternal sleep to eradicate centuries ago is rearing its ugly head. My advisors speak of necromancers in the southern realm, the secret plot to return my father to his throne, and those very men who want to use my soul-fated to bolster their power.” I exhale a troubled breath. “Fero lingers. I can feel him infecting the realms. Maybe not all of him, but enough to disrupt the flow of akasha. His power is growing while Saru remains in god-sleep.” I meet the Royal Star’s gaze. “We need to be ready for whatever comeswithoutanchoring the Starkeeper’s magic.”
“Is there any way to break this curse?” Ve asks, an uncharacteristic waver to their voice.
Powerlessness fills me. “No. I must reject my soul-fated and the most precious, divine gift of the bond, because if I succumb, the price could mean her death. I cannot anchor her magic in that form. The simurgh will eventually consume her.”
“You need to tell her,” Ve says softly. “She deserves to know the truth, Darrius. All of it.”
Though I don’t want to admit it, deep down I know they’re right.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Ani is angry, and rightly so, that I deceived her. After several days of giving me the silent treatment, she relents only when I corner her in the library. “Are you going to avoid me forever?” I ask.
“I thought we were friends.”
The guilt weighs heavy in my heart. “Weare. I needed to see him, Ani, and I wasn’t sure you would let me.”
“He could have killed you!” she snaps. “Gods, don’t you know what could have happened? The curse... the bond... you have no idea what you—” She breaks off with a strange half sob, leaving me desperate for her forgiveness, but eventually my softhearted friend takes pity on me. “Promise me you won’t risk yourself like that again.”
“I promise.”
When she indicates with a sigh that I should occupy my usual chair across from her, I gather the books I’ve been studying and sit gratefully. We read in silence. I vacillate on confessing what had happened with the manticore, but I don’t want to get the same reaction I’d received from her brother. It’s all too clear the king does not believe me, though I know in the depths of my soul that the manticore wouldneverharm me. He might be monstrous to everyone else, but he’s not to me. How I know this, I have no idea.
“May I join you?” a deep voice asks, making both Ani and me glance up from our texts.
The king of Everlea stands beside the table, looking tall, windblown, and annoyingly handsome. Silver hair loose over his broad shoulders, he is dressed simply in a black tunic and pants, sans his usual armor, with his tattoos peeking out at his collar and winding over his arms. His expression is not as cold as it usually is, though I don’t pretend to know what each degree of coldness means when it comes to this mercurial man.
There’s no doubt, however, that my ill-advised attraction hasn’t waned. I try to hide the feelings that the king evokes in me, but his presence is impossible to resist. I feel Ani’s notice turn my way, but I keep my face neutral despite the wild flurry in my body. “Fine by me,” I say casually.
Ani points to the empty seat, and her brother sprawls in the chair. “To what do we owe your visit, Dare?” she asks, her surprise evident, considering he has been avoiding us both.
“Can’t a man visit his own library?”
“You haven’t before, so what do you want?” she asks. “We’re busy.”
“What are you researching?” he asks, staring at the books scattered on the table.
Ani shoves a tome from her pile of books over. “Runes, specifically Oryndhrian runes. We need to get those cuffs off of her, if she will be expected to protect herself here.” She shoots her brother a pointed glance, and the king winces before his usual frigid expression slides into place.
“I might have an answer,” Darrius says, and waves an arm, beckoning someone over.
