Astrid knew this answer—had expected it, even—but if anyone could have come up with a solution, Freya would have been able to. The disappointment clogged her throat some more.She wanted to show Freya off to the world; she wanted everyone to know how much Freya meant to her.
If only Astrid could be someone else.
“All right,” Astrid said. “What would you have from me in private, then?”
Freya took a step closer. Their knees were almost touching. A flash of sun-kissed skin peeped out of the slit in Freya’s robe and then vanished. Her gaze was steady and serious, unblinking and unflinching.
“I am yours, Astrid. Completely. My body is yours, to shield you and to serve you. I would have whatever you want from me in private, and I offer you the same.”
Astrid looked away, blinking rapidly to prevent the unshed tears in her eyes from making their descent. Freya’s intensity was hard to stare at for too long. She was a star, brightly scorching, and Astrid wanted to plunge her hands into the core of her, even if they burned.
Another step closer. Their knees touched. Astrid moved hers slightly apart to make room for Freya’s leg. Her skin seared where they made contact. Astrid wanted more, more, more, no matter what it cost her.
“May I…?” Astrid asked, and Freya was already nodding. Astrid lifted one shaking hand to the knot of Freya’s robe and hesitated. She had stopped herself from going as far as she’d wanted last time.
She would not do either of them that disservice again.
Astrid tugged at the knot. The ribbon holding Freya’s robe fell to the floor. With hungry hands, Astrid skirted over the exposed skin of Freya’s stomach, the divot between her breasts. Her fingers found Freya’s shoulders underneath the robe. Freya’s skin was unbelievably warm and soft.
Astrid paused and looked up into Freya’s cool gray eyes. Freya was watching her with something between apprehensionand desire—taking in how Astrid took her in. Astrid waited, not breaking Freya’s gaze, and then Freya nodded, and Astrid flicked her wrists.
The robe pooled around Freya’s feet. She stepped back and straightened her posture.
It was easy to forget how short Freya was. Her presence could be so large and overpowering. She was like something out of a painting—fierce, an animal that couldn’t be trapped if you wanted to keep your fingers.
Astrid started at the column of her throat and worked her way down with her eyes. Freya’s skin was marred with old scars, shining in the light of the fire. Her shoulders were square and she tensed with the shifting of her muscles as she clenched and unclenched one of her fists.
Astrid gathered that Freya was uncomfortable like this. Exposed to the world without her weapons to protect her. As if reading her mind, Freya walked over to the nightstand on her side of the bed and rearranged two small knives.
Astrid found her own dagger from her pile of folded clothes and brought them to Freya, setting them next to the knives on the table. Freya looked up at her. Goddess, but she wasshort. Standing side-by-side, the idea of them together was laughable. Astrid’s ears burned. She was quite sure she looked ridiculous.
“I haven’t done this in a long time,” Astrid said, licking her lips. “And never… Never with a human. So I don’t know how it will go. I don’t want to hurt you.”
The corner of Freya’s lips twitched. “I have a high pain tolerance,” she said.
Unable to stop herself, Astrid’s eyes dropped to Freya’s scarred hands. Freya saw her looking and lifted her hands to place them on Astrid’s torso. The fabric of the robe crinkled around Freya’s fingers.
“It seems a bit unfair,” said Freya, “that only one of us is naked.”
And even though Freya had seen Astrid naked thousands of times, watching over her as she changed, Astrid may as well have unwrapped a present for Freya. As if unable to stop herself, Freya bent to kiss Astrid’s bare torso.
And then, gently, Freya gave Astrid a shove that landed her back on the bed.
Astrid swallowed. “Freya, I’m not sure I know what to do. I really haven’t… It’s been since before I was queen.”
The admission made Astrid’s ears hot, but Freya just looked at her thoughtfully. “Do you want to stop?”
“I… No.”
Freya’s hand went to her waist, where her knives would have been if she was clothed, and then paused, clenching and unclenching her fingers. It was the same reassuring gesture Astrid had seen thousands of times across the great hall. The one that meantyou are safe. The one that meantI will take care of you.
Freya lifted Astrid’s chin with one finger. “You have to be responsible every day,” she said. “Why don’t you let me take control for once?”
“Please,” Astrid choked out.
Freya leaned in until her lips were practically touching Astrid’s ear. Her voice dropped to a whisper. “Did you know ‘please’ is my favorite word?”
Astrid flushed down to her toes. The room was warm with the fire blazing in the hearth; it was warmer still with Freya leaning over her, her breasts grazing Astrid’s skin.
