Something in his tone had uneasiness slithering down my spine. “Okay…”
He closed his eyes and blew out a breath. “She asked, no, begged, me to step into his shoes at the company until he can return.”
I sucked in a breath. Everything in me powerfully revolted against that idea. Ryder didn’t want that. He had plans, dreams, goals, and a clear path to achieve them. My instinct was to tell him how I thought the idea was complete bullshit, and he should tell his mother so in no uncertain terms.
But I held back because I knew this man, and I knew he couldn’t leave his family in a lurch during a crisis.
“What… what did you tell her?” I asked as dread filled me.
He seemed to shrink before my eyes, transforming into an unhappy man I didn’t recognize. My Ryder was full of life. He was arrogant, snarky, and called me on my shit. I’d fallen in love with that man and—
Oh shit.
The realization slammed into me like a wrecking ball.
I fucking loved this man.
He blinked glassy eyes. “I told her yes,” he whispered. “Oh, God, Alex, what have I done?”
I grabbed him in a fierce hug, ignoring the plastic chair’s arm digging into my stomach. “We’ll get through it, Ryder,” I whispered in his ear. “I’m not going anywhere, and we will get you fucking through this together.”
“Promise?” he whispered in an insecure tone so un-Ryder, it broke my heart.
“Yes, Ryder. I promise.”
Thank you for readingShaken and Stirred.Get ready for the second half of Alex and Ryder’s story,Sip Happens,coming in the fall of 2025! Read on for an excerpt fromThe Duality of Swans, another M/M contemporary romance by Lilly Atlas!
THE DUALITY OF SWANS
TATE
“Will you hurry up already?” Randy hollered as he kicked a spray of dusty rocks down the dirt path. He spun, cupping his hands over his mouth and shouting, “Next time, I’ll bring that broken-down stroller in front of Old Man Hinkle’s trailer so I can roll your slow ass. At least we’d get there faster.”
Randy back-walked along the dirt road a good thirty feet in front of Tate with a forty of Budweiser sticking out from his back pocket. His hair, the same dark blond as Tate’s, was buzzed short as always. He constantly teased Tate for leaving it a bit longer and shaggier, calling him a girl and asking if he wanted pink bows for his birthday.
Tate rolled his eyes. His damn brother wasn’t breathing if he wasn’t acting dramatic or ragging on someone. “Where’s the damn fire?” he yelled back. “Pretty sure you’ve never given a shit about the county fair before. It ain’t going nowhere for five days. Why you gotta rush me? It’s too hot to walk fast.”
“The fire’s in my fucking pants,” Randy said, jiggling his crotch as he waggled his eyebrows. “Whit’s gonna be there. She told Ginger if I find her ’fore Daryl, she’ll blow me, but if he gets there first, he’s gonna get his cock sucked insteada me. So fucking move it.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. Tate slowed his pace, shooting his brother a smirk. “Has Whit seen those pubes on your face? Cuz ifshe has, it won’t matter what time you show up. She ain’t gonna blow you if she sees you looking like a walking ball sac.”
“Fuck you,” Randy said, stroking his new, patchy goatee. It grew darker than the rest of his hair, making him look stupid as hell. “Ma said it makes me look like a movie star.”
Snorting, Tate slowed to a snail’s pace. “Should probably do the opposite of what Ma recommends. In case you haven’t noticed, she’s strung out ninety percent of the time. Probably can’t see shit right.”
Randy flipped him the double bird. “Shut up. I look good. And can you just walk faster, loser? You’re doing this shit on purpose cuz you’re jealous. No chick wants your knob.”
Tate rolled his eyes again. Annoyance, not jealousy, had him messing with Randy. He didn’t give two shits about having some chick slobbering over his dick. Two years ago, Randy started calling him all sorts of names for not showing much interest in girls, so he talked the talk, but he’d yet to walk the walk. Not that Randy knew. Tate could spin a tale like nobody’s business, and he’d let Randy think he was getting some.
“Run ahead! What the hell do you need me with you for? Need me to cheer you on so you can get hard for Whit?”
“Fuck no.” Randy blinked, then laughed. “But, shit, you’re right. What am I doing waiting on your stupid ass? Later, loser.” He took off at a jog, shaking up that warm Bud hugging his ass. There’d be an unpleasant surprise if he offered the beer to Whitney after the poor girl blew him. At least something would erupt for her, though it’d be the last blowie she offered up. His brother needed a few more brain cells. Tate didn’t hold out much hope of him finding any.
He took his sweet time, strolling past cornfield after cornfield on his way to the county fair. Carnivals weren’t his scene, but he had a few extra bucks from the tile job he’d helped his neighbor, Jim, with last weekend. Jim gave him a hundred fucking bucksfor two days’ work. Tate hadn’t ever had his hands on that much cash at once. He spent eighty of it on groceries and saved twenty. The good groceries too. Frozen peas instead of the kind that came in a can and some bacon. Spending that last twenty on some funnel cake and a few rides at the fair would make this the most exciting night he’d had in ages.
By the time he reached the event, the sun had dipped into the horizon, leaving the whole fairground shadowed in twilight. Tate didn’t bother looking for his brother. The last thing he wanted was to walk behind some booth and find him getting blown by Whitney, the easiest girl in their high school. She was cool, though. She was always nice to Tate, which he couldn’t say of all of Randy’s dipshit friends.
At eighteen, she and Randy would graduate in a few weeks, while Tate had a few more years to go. Fifteen, but some days, he felt like forty. Guess that’s what happened when your old man was a damn deadbeat, and your mother couldn’t make it through the day without pumping something into her bloodstream. Some days she made it to her job waiting tables at the local truck stop diner, but it was a crap shoot. The only reason she hadn’t been fired was pity. The owner had known his mother since childhood and felt fucking sorry for her.
