My hard-on wilted. “Ryder, that’s sweet, really sweet, but you don’t have to. You’re already doing enough by driving us to the hospital. None of this is your responsibility.”
There were so many fun things he could be doing with his day. Soon, he’d be back in school. He should be enjoying his final few weeks off, not playing nurse to my mother.
“Alex,” he said, drawing out my name as he gave me a little shake. “We’ve talked about this. Why is it so hard for you to accept that we’re a team? That I’m not helping you out of some misplaced obligation but out of a desire to be your partner? You’re busy as hell. I’m not right now. Let me help.”
I bit the inside of my cheek. Was it really that simple? If the tables were turned, I’d be offering the same thing to him. Of course I would. So why was it so hard for me to accept what he claimed?
“I know you’re used to doing every little thing on your own. I know you haven’t had anyone you could rely on for a long time, if ever.” He tapped the side of my head gently. “But try to get itthrough this thick skull of yours that you don’t have to anymore. I’m not going anywhere. Your life is not scaring me away.”
Those words, simple at their core, meant more to me than any grand gesture or romantic display. Yet, I still struggled to embrace them. Maybe it was time to look into therapy. Time to admit my father’s leaving gave me a mountain of abandonment issues, and the major responsibility of taking care of my complicated family from a young age warped my view of family and responsibility.
When I tried to turn away, he grabbed my chin, forcing me to search his eyes, where I found sincerity, heat, and maybe even more. Maybe something I’d be terrified to reach for, especially because I might be feeling it, too, so I put it on the back burner for another time.
“Okay, you’re right,” I said, which made an enormous smile break across his face.
“Who doesn’t love those words?”
Chuckling, I shoved his shoulder. “Always so arrogant.” Then I sobered. “I’m trying, okay? I promise I’m trying to change my thinking and stop worrying that my family’s problems will become too much for you and you’ll run away.”
“Babe, I guarantee my family will implode at some point, and I’ll need you to jump in and peel me off the ground. The only reason it hasn’t already happened is because I’m avoiding them right now.”
Huh, knowing I could repay the favor of support in the future lifted some of my anxiety. “Deal.”
He nodded once, then pinched my ass. “Let’s get moving,” he said as I yelped and rubbed the spot.
“I think I liked it better when we hated each other.”
A strong hand cupped my dick. “Really? You sure about that? I was about to offer you a blow job in the shower. Guess I canrescind the offer if you prefer it the way it was when we hated each other.”
I rolled my hips, pushing into his palm as I fought to keep my eyes from rolling back in my head. I’d never been with anyone who brought me from zero to ready-to-fuck so quickly. All I had to do was see, hear, or smell him, and I wanted him. Then, when he touched me? I instantly and powerfully wanted him.
“I take it back,” I said with a gasp as he scraped his teeth across the tendons in my neck. “This is better. Please put your mouth on my cock.”
“Get in the shower, now,” he whispered with a final squeeze of my dick.
I shot out of the bed so fast you’d think he’d announced a bedbug infestation.
Ten minutes later, after removing a mountain of adaptive equipment from the bathroom, I was under the hot spray with my dick buried so far down Ryder’s throat I’d have worried I’d never get it back if I had any working brain cells. He grunted and groaned like a damn porn star as he drained my balls with a skill that amazed me every damn time he got his mouth on me.
I returned the favor with just as much enthusiasm, starting with a hungry dick suck and ending with a tongue fucking that had him biting his bicep to keep from scarring my mother with his cries of pleasure.
Fifteen minutes later, we stumbled out of the bathroom, dressed, sated, and ready to caffeinate so we could survive a long day of hanging around the hospital waiting room.
The hallway already smelled of coffee, which meant my mom had been able to get up and into her wheelchair by herself. It had been getting harder for her as the wounds on her feet progressed. Ryder pressed a kiss to my cheek and winked as though he understood without words what the delicious smell meant.
“Morning, Mom,” I said as I stepped into the kitchen, only to stop and frown at the scene before me.
Mom sat in her wheelchair at the table wearing the matching lilac sweat set I’d gifted her for Christmas. Her hair needed to be brushed, but that task had become difficult over the past few months, so I typically needed to help. Kenny sat at the table with her, wearing a wrinkled wife-beater and black flannel sleep pants. The bruising he’d suffered at the hands of a furious drug dealer had finally faded. That didn’t mean he looked good. Over the past weeks, he’d lost a lot of weight and had permanent dark rings under his eyes from long nights of drugged-out partying, minimal sleep, and crappy nutrition.
“What’s going on?” I asked as I took in the way they glared at each other across the table. Most of the time, Mom stayed out of Kenny’s messes. I tried to protect her from his antics as much as possible, but whatever she heard, she ignored for the most part, claiming he’d grow out of his ‘rebellious streak’ one day. To see her shooting daggers at him with her eyes had my stomach twisting. “Hello?” I said again when no one answered me. “What is going on?”
Ryder stayed quiet but didn’t leave. Maybe some would have thought he should have stepped out to give our family privacy, but the way he slid his hand against mine and linked our fingers, giving me his silent support, would forever stay in my mind. He was there for me, by my side.
I squeezed his hand as I said. “Someone needs to start talking right now.”
Mom shifted her gaze away from Kenny. “Your brother got arrested last night.”
My eyes widened. “Wha—”
