She sneers. “No, I mean, on the team.”
My blood freezes in my veins. “I-well, I didn’t choose this,” I say. She has to know this. I know she andRose were a hell of a duo. I played them a lot last year, and they were phenomenal to watch. “You know what the trades are like.”
Her sneer transforms into a scowl, her upper lip pulling at the edge. I’d say it’s without her knowledge that she did it, but I think that she’s genuinely pissed about me being here.
Fair enough, I guess.
If she had joined the Chill, I can’t say I’d have given her a warm reception.
“You’re going to leave and join another team, or I’m going to make your life fucking miserable.”
I sigh, “There’s no other team that’s opening their training camp. It’s either here or I’m done.”
“Then be done,” she says coldly.
“I can’t give up my livelihood yet.” I give her a small smile, hoping that she realizes what a bitch thing that was to say. “I still want to win the Cup.”
“You’re not going to win it with us.”
“I can better your chances,” I say, “You know I’m good at my job; you’ve played against me enough to know that I’m better on your team than against.”
“You’re not going to be on this team. What don’t you understand?” She snaps again. “You’re going to leave and never play again, or I’m going to make your life miserable.”
I take a moment to breathe, to pretend that what she’s saying isn’t destroying me emotionally. That everylittle brick I build through the day to make sure I’m impervious to doubt feels shaky in its slot as she stares at me down.
“A life without hockey will be just as miserable as one where you’re doing your worst,” I say, leaning in close to her. I look up at her, watching her pupils dilate as we get into each other’s faces. “So, do your worst.”
She pushes me, and I go gliding. She skates onto the ice. I grab hold of her jersey as she tries to rush past, and push her back. She scowls, and we’re in this weird pushing match, each one trying to push the other harder, and every time she gets in my face, a waft of her perfume and sweat rushes over me. It’s a scent that makes me a little lightheaded, and I hate that I find it so attractive.
And the way she scowls at me.
She stares at me, nostrils flaring, and suddenly the pushing match is getting much more real, and she fists my practice jersey, the pink drawing her in like a bull is drawn to red. “I’m not leaving here!” I snap, getting into her face. Her breath fawns across my face, and my stomach swoops at how close we are.
“Is everything alright here?” A voice calls out, and I push back from her. My cheeks burn at the thought of anyone seeing us in that position. She’s straight; she’s very obviously engaged to her university boyfriend. She hates my guts.
And I’m gay, but I’m not out to anyone here.
Fuck, there’s another thing to add to my list.
“Yeah! So sorry!” I call out, locating the janitor up in the stands. He has his hands on his hips as he looks down on us. Taylor doesn’t seem to want to turn around, and I have to prod her to wave at him as well. She gives him a tight-lipped smile.
“Don’t worry, Dave! Everything is good here. We’re heading out soon!”
He waves back and shuffles off. She turns toward me, jaw set.
“We’re at an impasse then.”
I nod. “See you tomorrow?”
“Only if you’re going to see this through.” She narrows her eyes. I can’t say that her game face scares me. It hasn’t been since college.
“Yeah, and when we win the Walter, you’re going to regret being such a raging bitch about me,” I declare and push past her to skate and get undressed. I let my breath out slowly, hoping it doesn’t betray how rattled I feel. She stays on the ice as I skate off, and I storm out of the arena like I’m on fire, which is how my soul feels, engulfed by the rage she can pull out of me. It’s a special skill of hers that I’m still wondering about. How does she know my buttons better than I do?
I strip and shower quickly, getting out of the locker room before she comes in and heading home to the hotel that I’m currently living out of until I can find a roommate or a single apartment. Once I close the door behind me in my hotel room, I drop my bag and fall face first onto the bed and fall asleep.
Five
Taylor
