Vero sighed. “We should probably find him before he pees on the floor.” We did a quick game of rock, paper, scissors to see who would get elbowed in the boobs while holding him and who would get kicked in the face while wrestling his pants on.
Then we walked in solemn procession to the playroom and opened the door. Vero scooped him up before he could stuff himself inside his sister’s dollhouse, while I attempted to wrangle him into his clothes. The doorbell rang.
“Do you mind answering that, Mrs. Haggerty?” I called out. “Our hands are full.”
I couldn’t make out her muttered retort over Zach’s tantrum as I dressed him, but that was probably a good thing. She had made it clear every day since she’d been here that she didn’t approve of my parenting methods, and if I had to listen to one more lecture from her, I was going to pack up my kids and move to Missouri.
I emerged from the playroom holding a writhing, fully dressed Zach in my arms. He quieted, arching up to get a better look when he noticed the two strangers standing on our front porch.
The woman held up a slip of paper in one hand and rested the other on her son’s shoulder. He looked about Delia’s age and Ifaintly recalled seeing them both in her classroom at career day a few months ago. The woman was speaking in sharp tones while Delia cowered behind Mrs. Haggerty’s legs.
“What’s this?” Mrs. Haggerty asked the woman.
“Thatis a bill for our medical expenses. My son suffered several serious injuries after your granddaughter assaulted him at school last week.”
I passed Zach off to Vero and stepped forward to intervene. “It’s fine, Mrs. Haggerty. I’ll handle it.”
Cooper’s mother blanched and took a small step back from the door. “You’reMargaret Haggerty? From the news? The one who was arrested and sent to jail?”
Mrs. Haggerty scowled at the woman. “What business is that of yours?”
“I’m sorry… It’s just… I didn’t expect—”
“Whatdidyou expect?” Mrs. Haggerty snapped. “An old lady with prison tats?” Vero nearly dropped Zach as Mrs. Haggerty pulled aside the neckline of her blouse, revealing the three-leaf clover tattooed below her collarbone. She let Cooper’s mother get a good, long look at it before tugging her shirt back in place. “Now that you know who you’re dealing with, it seems we have a different understanding of what transpired on the playground last week. According to Delia, your son was pulling her hair.”
“He was just being a little boy,” Cooper’s mother stammered.
“He was being a little bully! And don’t give me thatboys will be boysnonsense. That’s a load of horse dookie!” Mrs. Haggerty looked down her nose at Cooper. “Were you pulling Delia’s hair?” Cooper looked cautiously to his mother. They both flinched when Mrs. Haggerty raised her voice. “Your mother wasn’t on that playground, boy! I want to hear it fromyou. Did you or did you not pull Delia’s hair?”
Cooper nodded. His mother stood mute with shock beside him.
“How many times did she ask you to stop?” Mrs. Haggerty asked him.
Cooper held up three fingers, using his other hand to hold his fourth one down.
“Look here, young man.” Mrs. Haggerty pointed to the stitches in his forehead. “Bad things happen to poorly behaved boys who don’t know how to stop when they’re told. Next time, it might be worse. Delia’s a quick study, and I learned a thing or two during my stint in the cooler.” Mrs. Haggerty nudged Delia forward. “I believe you have something to say to my granddaughter.”
The woman prodded her son. “Apologize to Delia,” she said in a wobbly voice.
Cooper mumbled an apology.
Mrs. Haggerty cupped a hand beside her ear. “Speak up, boy! I can’t hear you.”
“I’m sorry, Delia,” he said, clear as a bell.
“Good,” Cooper’s mother said, pasting on a diplomatic smile as she patted her son’s shoulder. “Now Delia will accept your apology, and the grown-ups will settle the matter of the bill.”
“Delia doesn’t have to do any such thing! And neither does her mother. The consequences of your son’s actions are no one’s responsibility but his and your own.” Mrs. Haggerty tore the medical bill in half, then tore it once more for good measure. “Your business is done here. Tomorrow, you’re going to march yourself right back to that school and tell them none of this was Delia’s fault. If you don’t, I might have to show up atyourhome unannounced with a little business of my own.” Mrs. Haggerty slammed the door.
Delia beamed up at her with a wide toothless smile. I suppressed my shocked laughter behind my hand.
Vero let out a low whistle. “Nice tat, Mrs. Haggerty. What’d you have to do to get it?”
Mrs. Haggerty harrumphed. “I didn’t get it in jail, if that’s what you’re asking. I got that tattoo three years ago, but I didn’t see any reason to tell Cooper’s mother that. Let her think whatever the heck she wants.” She turned to Delia and Zach. “We’re done with school for today. Time for chores.” When the children whined about having to clean up their playroom, Mrs. Haggerty thrust a dustpan at Zach and gave Delia a hand broom. “In my school, you followmyrules. Everyone has a job to do. Everyone contributes.”
Vero and I watched in quiet fascination as Mrs. Haggerty marched the children to the playroom.
Vero burst into hysterical laughter as soon as they were out of earshot. “I might have passed judgment too quickly. That woman is one badass mama bear! She absolutely shredded Cooper’s mother.”
