I took them from her and dropped them back into the drawer, shoving aside stacks of random gas station, grocery store, and post office receipts that littered the bottom to reach deep into the back. My fingers closed around a small leather binder. It was worn soft with age, the edgesbent as if they’d conformed to the shape of a back pocket. A leather tie held it closed, and I pried it loose. A small pencil rolled out. The unlined pages inside were full of letters and numbers, strings of them scribbled beside dates and dollar amounts.
Vero peeked over my shoulder. “Looks like some kind of ledger,” she said, her sharp accountant eyes narrowing as she studied the columns inside it. “It looks like he’s had it awhile. Have you seen it before?”
I shook my head. This had definitely not been in his nightstand while we’d been living together, and yet the first entry had been written almost five years ago, not long after Delia was born. I flipped the pages, but there were no clear notes or clues I could make sense of.
Vero and I jumped at a knock on the bedroom door.
“Finn?” Steven’s voice was muffled on the other side. He rattled the knob. “Why’s the door locked?”
“Because I’m getting dressed!” I called back, rushing to tie the leather strap around the ledger.
“What are you doing?” Vero whispered. “That might be a clue to whatever Steven was involved in!”
“We can’t take it. He’ll notice it’s gone.” We argued over it in short, whispered expletives until she tore a single sheet from the middle of the book and threw the ledger back at me. She folded the page and tucked it into her bra.
“Everything okay in there?” Steven called.
“Everything’s fine!” I sang back as I buried it back in the drawer. I checked Steven’s room, making sure everything was exactly the way we’d found it before unlocking the door.
He thrust my cell phone at me when I opened it. “You left this in the kitchen and the damn thing wouldn’t stop buzzing. If you ask me, three texts in ten minutes makes your cop friend look a little desperate.”
“So does a pack of unopened condoms and the fact that nobody asked you,” Vero muttered.
Steven’s eyes darted to his nightstand as she made a show of checking her nails.
I positioned myself between them. “Were you reading my text messages?”
“I wasn’treadingthem,” he said, having the gall to look offended, “but it was kind of hard not to notice all the damn notifications popping up. And what the hell did he mean when he said he had agreat timethe other night?”
The doorbell rang downstairs. The children squealed and sprinted toward the foyer. Steven rushed after them, hollering at them not to open the door. Vero and I followed, holding the children a safe distance away as he peered through the front window to see who it was. He shut the blind and swore to himself as he opened the door.
“Susan, what a surprise,” he said in a saccharine voice as my mother shouldered her way past him into the house, holding a tin of cookies. He shook his head, grumbling to himself as he retreated upstairs to his bedroom.
“What are you doing here?” I asked as my mother dragged me into a suffocating hug.
“Georgia told me about the fire. I’ve been so worried.” She held me by the shoulders, inspecting every inch of me. Her eyes grew wide as they landed on the misaligned buttons of Steven’s shirt. “Oh, god, it’s worse than I thought,” she whispered, reaching down to cover Delia’s ears. “You spent the night here?”
Vero snorted as she took the tin of cookies from my mother and ushered the children into the family room.
“I didn’t spend the night here,” I said defensively. “Vero and I just got here. Our clothes were a mess, and I needed something to wear until our laundry is done.”
She crossed herself. “Thank you, Jesus. I was afraid you’d ruined things with Nicholas.”
“I didn’t ruin things withNicholas.” She was the only person I knew who called him that. “And what do you mean bythings? Whatthings?”
“Your sister told me you and Nicholas are seeing each other. She saidyou two have been intimate.” A dresser drawer slammed in Steven’s bedroom upstairs.
“Ma!”
“What? I’m not judging! Nicholas is a wonderful young man,” she said as she unbuttoned her coat. “He’s very attractive and he’s great with the children. I think it’s fine that you two are enjoying each other’s company.” Her eyes twinkled as she lowered her voice. “Just remember to go to confession.”
I shook my head as she handed me her coat. “You still haven’t told me what you’re doing here.”
“I saw Nicholas on the news this morning, and I was worried when I heard all those terrible things had happened at the police school, so I called your cell phone. When I couldn’t get through, I called your sister. She told me the children were with Steven and that you had gone home. I went to your house first but no one was there, so I came to check on Delia and Zach.” She cupped my face in her hands and kissed my cheek. “I’m just glad you and Vero are okay. When she told me you had been trapped in that fire…” She clutched her heart, the fretful lines around her mouth forming a hash mark for every year the worry had probably taken from her life.
The dryer buzzed as it tumbled to a stop. “Why don’t you go change out of that awful shirt and get your things?” she suggested. “We’ll take the children back to your house and I’ll make you all a nice, hot brunch.”
“We weren’t planning to go home,” I admitted. She paled, her eyes dipping once more to Steven’s shirt. “Vero and I were thinking it might be nice to get away for a while. You know, a girls’ weekend. We’re taking the children with us.”
