“And if we won’t?” It sounds as if Julio’s drawing a line in the sand. As if taking sides and walking away is even an option.
Jack’s expression hardens. He tosses the car keys to Julio and Julio catches them against his chest. “Take the car after breakfast. Get clear of the mountain. Leave the Handlers at the first medical clinic you find; then you and Amber split off on your own. Just be sure to break away from Chill and Poppy before anyone tracks you.” A strangled sound escapes my throat. They can’t leave. We can’t split up.
“What about Fleur?” Julio asks, his knuckles white around the car keys.
“Fleur can make her own choices.” Jack lets go of my hand. He yanks the ax from the tree stump and climbs the hill into the woods.
Something splinters inside me. Cracks as he disappears.
“You can come with us,” Julio says. “We’ll take care of you.” Amber doesn’t object. So they would keep me charged. Heal me when I need it. But who will stay and fight with Jack? Who’ll protect him? Who will save the Winter who risked his life for mine?
“I’m staying,” I tell Amber and Julio. Then I climb the steps to the cabin to make breakfast and say goodbye.
There’s no need for announcements. The windows of the cabin are thin. Marie steps out of my way to let me inside.
“We’re leaving, aren’t we?” Woody asks. He’s awake, sitting up in the rickety chair in the kitchen, his foot elevated on a small wooden stool.
Poppy’s watching me, her clear blue eyes revealing far too many of her thoughts as I grab an empty mug and spoon out flakes of instant coffee. “After breakfast. There’s a town not far from here. I saw the lights last night, down in the valley. You should be able to find a doctor and get that infection treated.”
“And then?” Chill asks, ripping open a box of cereal and setting it down hard on the table.
“Then you keep driving.” Julio tosses the keys to Chill. His tone leaves no room for argument. Amber stands behind him in the cabin door, discreetly wiping her eyes on her sleeve. “You put distance between us and stay off the grid as long as you can. They won’t be ableto follow you.” He stares at the floor. Doesn’t look at his Handler as her mouth falls open.
Tears prick my eyes. I want to hug him. To throw my arms around both of them for staying, but it would feel selfish, knowing what this choice has already cost them.
“So that’s it?” Marie snaps at him. She drops Slinky and tucks a cigarette behind her ear. “You’re just going to abandon me tothem?” She gestures to Woody with a look of disgust. “Chronos’s goons are on their way, and you assumehe’sgoing to take care of us? He’s a draft dodger, for chrissake!”
“I was a conscientious objector,” Woody says. “Thereisa difference, you know.”
“I don’t care what he is,” Marie barks at Julio, as if Woody’s not even in the room. “Just because your girlfriend gave him a knife doesn’t make him any less of a pussy!”
“And just because you’re wearing someone else’s dog tags doesn’t make you a goddamn hero.” Julio grabs the chain around her neck and holds the tags up to her face. “It’s not your name printed on them. That honor doesn’t belong to you. So quit acting like you’re the only one making sacrifices here.” He lets them fall against her chest.
“Screw you!”
“No, screw you!” I jump as Julio snatches the cigarette from behind her ear and tosses it to the floor. “I should have listened to Gaia on that bridge when she told me some people don’t want to be saved. You’ve made that perfectly clear since the day we met. Well, guess what? I’m not feeling guilty anymore. Like it or not, you’re alive, same as the rest of us. You don’t want to go with them? Fine. Then walk. But I don’t owe you anything!”
None of us speak. In all the years I’ve known Julio, I’ve never seen him lose his temper. Not like this. The sunlight through the windows dims. Dead leaves rustle in the rising wind outside, bare limbs scratching the walls of the cabin as it shifts with Julio’s mood.
Marie’s lip trembles. She scoops up her cat and storms out, slamming the door behind her.
Amber starts after her.
“Let her go.” Julio glances at the thickening clouds through the window. He takes a slow breath, forcing the tension from his shoulders, as if he knows a storm will only draw attention we don’t need right now. “There’s only one way off the mountain. They can pick her up at the bottom of the road. By then, she’ll have cooled down.”
“And if she doesn’t want to come with us?” Chill asks.
“It’s her choice. I’m done making decisions for her.” Julio retreats to the back room. Amber and I exchange a look, both of us probably thinking the same thing. The wind has calmed, but the sky’s still dense and gray around the cabin. This is harder on Julio than he’s letting on.
Amber stands behind Woody’s chair. He leans his head back against her, everything they need to say to each other passing between them through the silence, as if they’ve known all along it was coming. As if they’ve already said their goodbyes. The same way Poppy and I did in our hospital room all those years ago, making peace with the inevitable.
Poppy stands alone by the window. I wrap my arms around her and stare at our reflection in the glass.
“It’ll be okay,” I tell her through a lump in my throat. She’s frail, fragile here, and any lingering uncertainty I have about letting her leave melts away the longer I hold her. Jack’s right. She’s not safe with us.None of them are. “You and Woody can find a doctor and get well. Then you can go anywhere. All the places Jack promised.”
“I thought we’d have more time,” she says, swiping a tear from her cheek.
“I did, too.”
