ALWAYS TELLING WEIRD STORIES
SCARVES NEVER MATCH HER SHIRTS
FAVORS ACTORS OVER TECHIES
ABLEIST??
LOSES THE DEPARTMENT MONEY WITH TERRIBLE CHOICES
TREATS ME LIKE A GLORIFIED ASSISTANT
LETS CAMBULLY MEGET AWAY WITH EVERYTHING
DOESN’T CARE ABOUT ME
NEVER LISTENS TO ME
NEVER HELPS ME WHEN I NEED IT
I take a deep breath, rip off the list, and stuff it in the very back of my binder where no one will ever see it. I don’t really hate Dr. L. I just needed to vent.
But just once, I wish she’d pick me over Cam.
***
In seventh period, Dr. L doesn’t bring up my portfolio, and how we never finished. And she doesn’t at rehearsal, either.
She does make sure I note the changes in blocking. And has me sit in different seats to check sight lines. And asks if I’ve updated the prop list. And has the whole cast congratulate Cam on his acceptance to AMDA. No one claps harder than Philip, even though he looks a little sad too. He didn’t audition for AMDA. I’m not even sure he’s going to study Theatre after he graduates.
They’re probably doomed to break up. Maybe they were from the start.
Still, that doesn’t stop them from cuddling in the very last row of benches, ignoring their scene changes until I have to go up and shout at them.
“Can you just cool it, Jackthon?” Cam disentangles himself from Philip. “No need to get jealous.”
I roll my eyes.
I’m not jealous of Cam for getting into AMDA, and I’m certainly not jealous of him and Philip. Not when I have Liam.
“Whatever. Can you join us onstage or do you need me to fill in for you?”
“Like you even could.”
Given I know his lines better than him...
After rehearsal, Dr. L packs and is gone before I’m even done sweeping. Liam heads out too—he’s got an awkward dinner with his dad.
“Sorry to leave you,” he says, tucking in my tag and squeezing my shoulder for just a bit too long. With the other actors stillpacking up, there’s no way we can kiss goodbye, but his quiet, knowing smile makes everything a little better.
Once I’ve swept and set the ghost light and closed up the theatre, I head down to the choir room. Jasmine’s already gone, shopping with Amy at Target tonight, so I’ve got to wait for Bowie to get out of their GSA meeting.
I take a quick peek in through the choir room door. Cheyenne’s gone again, so Bowie is running the meeting. They spot me, give a quick nod, and I retreat out of sight. The last thing I need is for Braden to notice me and try tobrome into submission.
I slide down the wall beneath a trophy case and pull my iPad back out, but after a few moments staring at it, I just get angry again. So I put it away and pull out my stage manager binder. It’s getting way too full the closer we get to the show. The back folder is stuffed with three years of breakup lists. Maybe I need to find an archival system or something.
I scan Dr. Lochley’s list again. I don’t know what I have to do to make her see me.
As I sigh, a white sneaker taps against the sole of my foot.
