“Well, I’m about to blow your mind,” Clara said.
“What?” He was struggling to lift his head, but he couldn’t move or he’d wake Lucinda.
“How was she?” Clara asked, handing him a pillow so he’d be more comfortable.
“She was fine. Went down easy.” He said, “Blow my mind?”
“About my appointment,” Clara said.
His eyes widened. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong.” And then she began backtracking because that wasn’t true. “I mean, nobody’s going to die,” she said.
“What is it?” She knew that look—Nick was steeling himself. It was the way he used to flare when toughs gotrough at his pub, how he’d just look harder. Except now he was supine with a beautiful baby snoring on his chest.
“I’m pregnant,” she said.
“Clare,” he said, like a warning.
“With twins.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” He had to whisper. And what would he have done if he had been able to get up, she wondered, if he wasn’t immobilized by Lucinda? Would he have sprung to his feet and punched a wall?
He said, “How?”
She said, “I don’t even know. The usual way, I suspect.”
“But I thought—”
“Me too,” she said. “The universe is messing with us.”
“With twins,” Nick said. “Like, two.”
“For real. And I’m fourteen weeks now. And they’re growing well, the technician said. Off the record, I mean, but I could see. I honestly never thought I’d get this far.”
“You knew?” he demanded, sitting up quickly, waking the baby up.
“I kind of knew,” she admitted. “But I didn’t think anything was going to happen. The doctor recommended iron supplements. I’ve been taking them.”
“You saw a doctor?” Nick was furious. “All these weeks and you’ve never said a word?”
“I didn’t think it was going to matter,” she said. “I was sure we were going to lose this one too.”
“So you said nothing?”
“I’ve had a lot on my mind.” Lucinda was warming up from confused snuffling into a full-blown wail. Nick tried to hand her over, but Clara waved him away. “Youwoke her up,” she said.
“She’s hungry,” he said. The default, but Clara didn’t move. “Clare, what honestly is this?”
“What is what?” Lucinda had started to scream.
“Seriously, just take her. I’ve had her on my own all day.”
“So what?” said Clara, unmovable. “I have her on my own every day.”
“And now you’re bloody having twins?” said Nick. “That’s a fantastic plan.” He was shouting over the baby’s screams. “Just take her,” he said, and she did. She unbuttoned her shirt, unsnapped her bra, and the baby found her way. Now it was easy, natural, a relief.
She said, “It wasn’t exactly a plan. I mean, it happened. I’m pregnant. I’m as stunned as you are.”
