“But I thought the point of this was to–”
Footsteps crunched through the brush. Cosmo turned, and his heart caught in his throat. Zedd approached, hands in the pockets of his suit jacket. Zedd had never worn a suit in his life. Coupled with his slicked hair and completely unnecessary sunglasses, he looked like a high school’s biggest douchebag headed to prom.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Déjà spat.
“I’m here to pay my respects, what else?” Zedd said.
Cosmo walked toward him and balled his fists. There was so much adrenaline pumping through him that he could barely feel his fingers. “You were not invited, and you can’t be here.”
“I can’t come to my own boyfriend’s funeral? I have rights.”
“‘Rights’ my ass.” Déjà shoved him. “Cosmo isn’t yours.”
“Oh no? Then why, after he said he didn’t want anything to do with me, did he invite me into his place last week? Why did he tell me he loved me? Why did we spend the afternoon in his bed?”
Déjà’s mouth fell open. She turned to Cosmo. “He’s lying. Right?”
Cosmo shrank and spun the garnet ring around his finger. Goddamn it, Zedd. “That was a mistake. And we are not–”
“Cosmo!” Déjà’s voice broke. Her nostrils flared, and even in the dark he could see the utter disappointment in her face. “I’ve watched this asshole break your heart over and over. And every time, I let you fall apart on me. I helped you back up and reminded you of your worth. And still, andstill, you go back to him.”
He backed against the church and put up his hands. “You don’t understand what happened.”
“Oh, I understand plenty! I helped plan this whole thing for you! I wrote you an obituary and bought you an urn and how are all those people inside going to feel when they find out this whole event is a sham because you aren’t moving on? Your old life isn’t dead at all. It’sundead, in the form of this stinking, rotting tumor of a man standing here. And I’m a complete fool for thinking things would ever change.” She wiped her hands down her face, and the ouroboros inked onto her palms smeared onto her cheeks.
“It’s different this time. It’ll never happen again.” Cosmo’s throat constricted, tension coiling in his limbs. He bared his teeth at Zedd. “Get the hell out of here.Now.”
Zedd scoffed. “Do we have to do this every time we have a little spat? When I went to talk to you, I had every intention of leaving you alone afterward. Butyouinvited me inside.Youclimbed on top of me and said you needed me because I was the only one who was ever meant for you.”
He’d done that, but no one was listening to him when he said it had been a mistake. And Déjà didn’t know the horrible things Zedd had said afterward that cemented that realization into Cosmo’s mind. He turned to Déjà. “I took him back too many times. I know that. But I thought about how my mom had thrown my–”
Déjà let out a snarl and jabbed a finger at Cosmo. “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t watch you ruin yourself time and again over this unfaithful malignancy. It’s self-harm, and I won’t be a part of it.”
His mouth fell open. “But you’re my dearest–”
“No. Not anymore. I can’t.” Whirling on Zedd, she said, “The next time you play with explosives during a gig, I hope you blow your dick off.”
“You goddamn witch.” Zedd shoved Déjà, and she fell on her backside in the dirt. “Somebody should burn you at the stake.”
Cosmo slammed his fist into Zedd’s jaw so hard the impact vibrated all the way up his arm. Zedd stumbled back, his sunglasses askew. He pressed a hand to his face and tried to speak. Blood bubbled from his lips. Cosmo swung hard and socked him in the eye. Zedd swept out his leg and kicked Cosmo in the ankle. Cosmo folded, and his head cracked against the ground. White stars burst in his vision; the pain in his skull throbbed so hard he was too stunned to react. Zedd snatched a handful of Cosmo’s veil and yanked. It tightened around Cosmo’s throat, and he let out a strangled gasp.
Zedd’s knees dug into the dirt on either side of Cosmo, the taffeta wrapped around his fist. His split lip shone glossy in the candlelight. “Why are you doing this? Iloveyou. We’re going to be together forever.”
He jerked the veil – and Cosmo with it – toward him, then planted a kiss on Cosmo’s mouth. Blood ran down Cosmo’s throat, and he gagged. Groping through the dirt, he grasped the wooden cross. Splinters jabbed into his fingers as he ripped it from the ground and smashed it into Zedd’s head.
Zedd groaned and lost his grip. Cosmo shoved him away and backed into someone’s legs. Royce scooped an arm around Cosmo and hauled him up, then strode for Zedd, who was doubled over on the ground. Royce kicked Zedd in the back. Crying out, arms flailing, Zedd fell into Cosmo’s grave.
“Get up, and I’ll kill you.” Royce scraped a pile of dirt into the hole with one shiny loafer. “Get near Cosmo again, and I’ll kill you. If I ever see your face again, I’ll kill you. Do you sense the theme here?”
The skin at Cosmo’s throat was raw, the back of his skull throbbing and broken nails aching. Royce put his arm around him and led him toward the church. He leaned into the protective hold. Thank God.
He scanned the dark field, hoping Déjà was still nearby. Was she okay? She couldn’t have meant it, that she was cutting him out of her life. They’d been friends for years. It couldn’t just end like that. But if she needed time away from him for her own emotional health, he needed to leave her alone.
He wasn’t going to go back to Zedd, but that didn’t repair the gaping cracks inside him. Déjà had tried to hold them together, but they were too great. And maybe she was right, that the best thing to do was for everyone to leave Cosmo in his disrepair until he broke apart entirely.
Royce led him to the church doors, then lightly took Cosmo’s chin and stared into his face. It was hard to keep eye contact with Royce’s intense blue gaze, but it pinned Cosmo in place. “This is your party. You buck up and hold your head high. Understand?”
He nodded and struggled to swallow the lump in his throat.
