Yet, as the door shut behind him, her body cried out,Go after him!This is your chance.You can have it all like the women in your books.He loves you!She shook her head, arguing with her subconscious.She wasn’t a character in a novel, and this wasn’t a fantasy.
No.No matter what it cost her, she had to remember why she was doing this.He’d unwittingly sacrificed so much of his career, his reputation, hislifefor her, and she’d finally figured out what she could give him in return.
His freedom.Ironically, it was what he’d wanted most in the beginning of this anyway.Wasn’t fate a wily bitch?
CHAPTER ELEVEN
What was leftof Jace’s shattered heart slipped down into his stomach as he walked down Paige’s driveway.Where the fuck was he even heading?He was quite literally homeless, since he’d assumed he’d be shacking up with his wife.
His wife.The words sounded hollow now that the meaning had been stripped of them.And him?A husband?It was just another role for him to play, with another co-star who wasn’t reading her cues.He’d thought they’d crossed over the liminal space between real and fake two nights ago, if not sooner.But no.
The gravel crunched under his feet, exacerbating the physical feeling of crumbling to dust.He’d let another woman go too far in thinking he could love her but this time, he’d been the one to fall, not her.
Aurelie had made him want more, made him long for something beyond his career aspirations.She gave him purpose.
Well, not anymore, his asshole of a subconscious added.When the door behind him opened, and the unmistakable sound of Aurelie’s grumbling about the chill pierced the air, his spirits lifted.He wheeled around, a smile tugging reluctantly at the corners of his mouth.She’d made a mistake by sending him away.He’d known it the second he’d walked out the door.So what if it had taken her a quick second to realize it?At least she had.
“Aurelie,” he said.“I’m sorry.I didn’t mean—” he started, but she put her hand up to stop him.
“I wanted to give you the keys to my apartment.I promised you could stay there when you’re in town, and I feel bad taking that from you just because, well, just because.”
And with that, the last shred of hope he’d been clinging to evaporated, leaving his hands and heart empty.He cleared his throat, swallowed back the lump of heat that had built up since he’d left Paige’s.
“I’m going to be in town longer than just a few days, Aury.I meant what I said; I’m rebuilding the ranch and staying on to work it.”He hadn’t said that last part out loud to anyone, but it was one more truth this place had dug out of him.
“That’s fine.Stay as long as you like.”She wouldn’t meet his gaze, a small mercy as far as he was concerned.God knew looking into her deep-green eyes would only make things worse.
“Where, um, where will you be?I don’t want to put you out.”And as far as he could recall, there was only one bed in that apartment.He was strong, but only a class-five-hurricane-strength force would be able to keep him from her if they were still living in the same space.
“I’m going to stay days with Steve, be there on call at the hospital with Jackie at night, so Steve can rest.I’ll be back every now and then to change out my clothes, if that’s okay.”
If that was okay.
None of this was okay with him.He wanted to see her every day, and not just in passing.He longed to fall asleep beside her and have her face be the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes in the morning.
Dammit.Why wasn’t this truth one he could have said earlier?
He was good and fucked, that was for sure.
“That’s fine, thanks.If your feelings change, let me know.I’m happy to get a hotel.”
Or have her move right back in with him.If her feelings oscillated in that direction, he’d be a made man.
“No, I promised.And feel free to bring Max.I know how small the apartment can seem without company.”
Hearing his second-favorite name on his first favorite’s lips was like a punch to the gut.If she could start acting like a world-class bitch right about now, that’d be helpful.Thislet’s-stay-friendsshit was gonna kill him.Still, the idea of Max up here didn’t sound half bad.It might be just enough to keep him sane while he caught glimpses of his wife around town.
“Thanks.I’ll do that.”
He had no idea what else to say to the woman standing in front of him that wouldn’t sound like a plea.
To stay.
To give them a chance.
To love him back.
But no matter how he sliced it, it was his fault.He’d offered her a way out of a crappy situation, but he’d been the one to set such insurmountable boundaries.He didn’t think he’d ever get over the ache that permeated his veins, his chest cavity, his limbs at how bad he’d effed this up.
