“These kinds of things don’t happen to me every day,” I admitted, as I let my attention wander to my wrist, dirty with blood, suspended between his fingers.
“You shouldn’t be scared.”
We couldn’t get too close to each other; James knew that.
And I knew it, too, but my judgment stopped working when I smelled his scent.
I behaved and acted irrationally. And the most ridiculous thing was that he was fine.
Why didn’t he pull back? My behavior didn’t make sense.
Breathing while I was so close to his face was heavenly. The tips of our noses grazed each other. I saw him close his eyes.
He didn’t move as our foreheads fit together. James didn’t open his eyes, but he grabbed my sides, making the contact last longer than it should have. He’d never kiss me, never, never, never, never—
Then he opened his eyes and gazed into mine.
“James.”
“June.”
“Attention.”
“Jesus Christ!” I yelled, scared when the door screeched. Jackson’s usual arrogant air was replaced by him staring at us, concerned.
“What’s going on?” I asked, while James put his hands quickly to his knees.
“Will is, uh, a little twitchy. He’s about to get some target practice on the china cabinets in the living room using a fucking pool ball.” This would’ve been an unrealistic and comical remark if James hadn’t jumped up from the sink at the speed of light. He looked like he was suddenly gripped by anxiety.
“Fuck!” he exclaimed, rushing out of the bathroom while he rubbed his side.
“White?” Jackson called me sharply, bringing me back down to earth.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll pretend I didn’t see anything.”
“There’s nothing to—”
“You can fuck with other people, but not me. Cut it out before someone really gets hurt.”
>> <<
When James’s car pulled up in front of my house, Will turned to me. “Your mom’s not back from her trip yet, is she?” he asked.
“She comes back the day after tomorrow.”
“Wouldn’t it be better if you spend the night with me?”
Will’s suggestion wasn’t that crazy because I probably wouldn’t be able to sleep a wink alone at home.
“I don’t know.”
I definitely didn’t want any more emotions today.
“You better take me home now. I have to study, and besides, I don’t know, maybe I’ll bike over tonight.”
“Doesn’t she have friends? Why does she always have to be with us, Will?” spat James from the driver’s seat.
