“It’s not what they look like. It’s just their attitude.”
Tiffany, with her velvety voice, pulled me out of my agony and brought me back down to earth.
“What do you mean?”
“The first step to loving yourself is accepting yourself. Being sure of yourself is the first step to others liking you. When you like yourself, when you feel truly special, then others will be attracted to you as if you truly were. But until then, the only people who can really see you are those who can see beyond the surface.” She stroked her lower lip with the mouthpiece of a vape pen, continuing to gaze at those girls rapt.
“So . . .”
“So there’s nothing wrong with you, June. And if the others think so, it’s their problem, seeing as they don’t even know you.”
The discussion made me reflect, and I understood that that was the exact mistake that I’d made with Tiffany. I’d judged her before I even knew her, thinking she was boring and vapid.
“That’s why you’re not comfortable wearing a bikini, isn’t it?” she guessed, thinking she’d solved the riddle.
The noise in the background distracted both of us.
“Who’s that?” I asked when a tall, dark-haired, tattooed guy got close to James’s ear.
“Scott. Sammy’s new boyfriend.”
The guy repeatedly grazed against James’s chest with his hand while his eyes seemed to be morbidly attracted to his lips. They looked at each other wide eyed, and I was forced to take my eyes off them.
What was the point of staying there watching him flirt with a guy?
James and I were in two worlds that were far apart and had nothing to do with the other.
I was the one who listened to Taylor Swift, liked dogs, and drank hot chocolate even in the summer. That was June White’s worst transgression.
“Can I ask you something, June?”
I nodded at Tiffany, who seemed perplexed.
“Did you and James sleep together?”
“Yeah.”
She raised an eyebrow, stunned by my answer.
“Oh, um, how was it?”
“What? No, what did you think—”
“Did you?”
Tiffany didn’t make any gesture, but it was easy to figure out what she was talking about.
“What? No! Why do you think something silly like that? We never even kissed.” I groaned, overcome by embarrassment.
“Are you kidding? You slept together and didn’t—”
“No, I swear, I’d tell you.”
And if I was honest, Tiffany was clearly incredulous.
“You didn’t even?”
“Nothing,” I revealed, whispering.
