“Not even if you said—”
I pulled away from the metallic wall and walked back toward her. It was a dangerous game, but now I had to know.
“Not even if I told you I wanna see you there?”
She let out a sob; I saw it clearly. To my surprise, it was harder to make her give in than I’d thought. June bowed her head, continuing to shake it.
“No?” I pressed.
“No, I better not.”
“Fuck, June, why are you acting like this now?”
I saw her look around before speaking softly again. “Look, I don’t know what kind of game you have in your head, but I don’t want to be a part of it.”
“What the fuck are you saying?”
“With Will—I heard you guys talking about it.”
Obviously, it didn’t even occur to her that it would’ve been William’s idea.
“You don’t understand.” I’d started a conversation, and I didn’t know where it would lead. I felt confused and flushed.
This whole matter of finding out if she had marks on her was turning out to be a double-edged sword. She pulled back and looked like she was about to open rapid fire on me.
“Look, James, you’re the one who doesn’t get it. I’m losing myself being around you guys.”
Her sentence threw me off center. How could I blame her?
“Every time that you’re near me, I do stupid stuff, and I don’t want to blame you. I make my own decisions, but it doesn’t—”
“What?”
Her eyebrows lowered into a gentle expression, sealing the end of all the strength that she had worked so hard to display.
“I don’t trust myself when I’m with you,” she breathed, out of breath.
“But I wouldn’t have done anything with you. Not like that, not with him,” I said quietly.
Her chest was heaving, and instead of making space for her, I took it away from her. I drew nearer to her face, breathing in the scent of her hair.
“I don’t believe you, James.”
“And most of all, I’d never let Will do that,” I admitted, with my stomach topsy-turvy.
“And so then why—”
Fuck, I couldn’t hold back anymore.
“There was something between us.” I shrugged, continuing to look down at her.
“Did he ask you?”
She kept tracing the contour of my lips with her eyes. I knew the shape of hers by memory. I just needed to find out the taste and texture . . .
At that point, June remained as rigid as an icicle, so I grabbed her hips and pulled her against my chest, enjoying the softness of her breasts and her inexperienced and clumsy reaction.
“June.”
