But how did I see them?
Open your eyes, June. Try to look past them.
Marvin had always been nice to me. He always seemed to want to find the good in every situation.
I liked William’s sensitivity, but I’d also witnessed his darker moments.
Jackson on the other hand, with his heavy armor, demonstrated on more than one occasion that he was sensitive to the opinions of others, especially those of friends.
James? I hated him the most. But despite that, he had his good sides. He was altruistic and probably convinced that the life of someone he cared about was worth a lot more than his own. And he’d screwed up big-time. He was used to taking hits like he did with Austin. He was strong and determined. If Austin called him little bro, it was definitely because he had something in common with that family of criminals, and that couldn’t have been an easy situation for him. I thought about the woman in the photo again, James’s mom, and that unusual hair color, the same as Tom and Ethan had.
It was the second time that day that I’d thought about that picture. What if it was the key to everything? What if Jasper had tried to show me more than what I’d managed to see? Blaze pointed James out as he walked in front to head to a private room.
“What’s so special about James?” I asked Blaze.
“He’s unattainable.”
“He’s slept with the whole school. That doesn’t seem unattainable to me.”
“No, well, he’s very attainable from that point of view. I don’t mean in that sense.”
“And what do you mean?”
There was no point in pretending not to see that Blaze had a thing for James. It was like there was something between them.
“Are you speaking from experience?” I hit him where it hurt, and he blushed furiously.
“No. No. It’s just a feeling. Try to ask the girls he’s been with. There’s something about him you can’t figure out.”
I’d talked with the girls I thought were “his girlfriends” but in the end it seemed like Blaze knew him best.
“But he is an asshole.” I cut Blaze off. “Right?”
“June, you’re Will’s girlfriend, so you’ll never know how much of an asshole he really is. You don’t know what he’s capable of just to defend the people he cares about.”
Was Blaze talking about what James had done to his dad?
“I gotta go now.”
I saw Jackson beckon Blaze from far away, so I gave them some privacy. Now it was time to talk with Will and then go home. But instead of joining him at pool table, I headed to the private room. I pulled the curtain back just enough to peek inside. Three people were exchanging kisses. One of them was James, sitting listlessly on a couch. A girl with a tight-fitting minidress was in front of him while his arm was around another girl. He said he’d take Will home, and instead . . . He turned his head to kiss someone I didn’t see at first. My jaw almost fell to the floor. James was making out with a guy.
21
June
I didn’t see that right. My eyes must’ve been playing tricks on me.
The lump in my throat continued to get bigger until I felt like I was suffocating.
I want to go home. Now.
“June, are you sure you’re okay?”
The warmth of Blaze’s voice brought me back to reality. I felt as cold as a corpse. I felt my sweaty cheeks. My head was spinning.
“No. I mean, yeah. I’m fine.”
I opened my mouth to take the deepest breath possible. The place had suddenly become more suffocating than usual.
