But the self-loathing that replaced it was of a different sort than before.
I’d gotten Ainwir killed. He’d toiled every day to keep me safe, and I’d never known the sacrifices he’d made for me. In the end, he gave his life for me.
And in return? I’dhatedhim. Cursed his name.
Phaedrus wanted to use me to kill everyone and everything. And because of me, Seth had betrayed us and ruined all our plans.
Like the Empty itself, I brought nothing but destruction and pain.
Perhaps sending me into the Acheron, never to return, would be the best outcome for us all.
Raising my head, I caught Eleos’ eye. His mouth warbled, and he looked like he wanted to reach out.
He’d been reading my thoughts.
Anger flashed across Eleos’ face as he turned back to Seth. “Do you have any idea how much you’ve hurt her?”
The guilt vanished from Seth’s mien. He scowled. “Far less than the pain of being repeatedly raped before being tortured to death.”
I flinched. His words felt like a slap across the face.
What had the previous maidens felt when they were torn from their child and forced into the unknown? How had they died? The thought haunted me.
“I regret nothing,” Seth said. “I’ve lostenough. Even if I have to drag them kicking and screaming, I will protect whatlittleI have left.”
Eleos’ expression calmed. For a moment, I thought he’d accepted Seth’s answer. Voice as even as a blade, he stepped back. “Fine. I’ll just have to make you understand, then.”
Seth’s hardened expression shattered. Pain danced in his eyes, and he dropped to his knees with a whimper. Squeezing his eyes shut, he gritted his teeth, drawing blood from his bottom lip.
Confused, I stepped back, trying to understand what was wrong with him.
Eleos was changing Seth’s emotions. Gasping in realization, my fingers flexed in their shackles as I tried to reach for him. “Stop it!”
Malice gleamed in Eleos’ eye as he peered down at his victim. “Finally, I’ve found your weakness. I’ll give you credit—your walls were hard to break.”
Part of me hated Seth for what he’d done, but even that half of me couldn’t bear to see him suffer. I stepped between them. “El!”
Eleos eyed me coldly as Seth gritted his teeth, tears burning in his eyes.
I staggered back.
Thiswas Eleos’ darkness. I gazed upon the man he swore he no longer was. The man he’d tried so hard to hide from me.
Eyes flying wide, Eleos paled, clenching his fists. Seth gasped in relief, the tension draining from his face.
“I . . .” I stuttered. “Give me a moment with him, El.”
Nodding, Eleos stepped away, but remained within earshot.
Regaining his feet, Seth caught his breath before finally meeting my gaze.
Gnawing on my bottom lip, I recalled the emotions Phaedrus had tormented me with. Seth grieved someone. A mother, and a lover, I believed.
Oh, gods. If Seth was the king’s son, it meant his mother had been an Elpis maiden.
Had the woman he’d loved been one, too?
How could I bring myself to hate him for what he’d done, when I could hardly comprehend that kind of pain?
