Those of us who spent time with him, however, knew better. We’d seen the ugliness inside him, the depravity, and he let loose only a fraction of that into his voice. It went to show that Marleena here—or more likely those who had sent her—had drifted to dangerous grounds. They were playing with a bomb, and I knew for sure that Carter had no problem taking out anyone he needed to when it came down to it.
“Let me make myself perfectly clear—we aren’t interested. Not in your body, not in your guiding, not in you. So I’m going to suggest in the nicest way I can that you don’t make the mistake of trying this again. I don’t like to repeat myself, so if I have to? I’m not nearly so nice the second time.” Carter didn’t wait for a response, instead standing in the water—not giving a damn howmuch of himself he exposed above the waterline—grasped the edge of the hot tub and hopped out in a graceful move.
Shear followed suit, then Kenyon—though Kenyon sure didn’t manage it that smoothly. His feet slipped against the flooring, and only holding onto the edge of the tub kept him upright. I doubted this whole walk-out would work nearly as well if we had to lift Kenyon’s wet ass up off the floor after he fell all sprawled eagle style.
She didn’t appear hurt, only staring at each of us as though still trying to work out a next step. It went further to show that none of this was really her fault, even if she was the one to take the blame in the moment.
She stared right at me, last. “I’ve heard that your predilections are more extreme than the others, that you need company after exertion. I can offer that.”
And just like that, she shoved me toward Yun.
Predilections.What a filthy fucking word. Apt, maybe, but it made me feel like shit, like a beast driven by needs and instincts instead of a fucking person.
Yun hadn’t clung to me the way she had out of service. She hadn’t done it because she’d been told to. No, she’d fucking held me so tightly because she’dwantedme.
Maybe that was the first time in my whole damn life I’d experienced that, but now that I had?
I didn’t want to fuck around with people who didn’t give a fuck about me.
“Not a fucking chance,” I muttered and hopped out of the tub.
We left Marleena there as we put on robes that hung beside the door, along with sandals. We weren’t about to wear our filthy shit from before.
“We don’t mention this to Yun,” Carter said once we were outside, the walk a short one to get back to our own trailer and our own guide.
“Agreed,” I said. “Women don’t like to hear there was another woman around, especially a naked one. Doesn’t matter that we didn’t go for it, it won’t end well.”
“I don’t like lying,” Kenyon muttered.
“Not a lie. We just don’t have to bring it up.”
He let out a long sigh, one that said he didn’t like the idea, but he usually gave in. More often than not, he figured if we had a difference of opinion, the reason was his stupidity.
I couldn’t say that it was the right choice, but I could say I didn’t want to see Yun hurt—especially because I doubted this was going to be the last time we saw Marleena, or the Guild’s dirty tricks.
Chapter Fifteen
Yun
I stretched my legs out, leaning back against Kaidan, content to just rest for a moment. Something about him always made me feel as though I didn’t have to watch myself, didn’t have to worry.
He was a friend—hell, maybe closer to family. I hadn’t had much of that, not since everything had happened, not since the world had taken my parents, my home, my freedom, my future.
Except… I thought to the men and wondered if perhaps I’d found something else?
No, that was foolish and far too romantic for a person like me. I knew better than to let myself fall into such notions.
“I can’t believe you’re still here,” I said. “I don’t think you’ve stayed in one place this long since I’ve known you.”
“What can I say? I’m a wandering soul. I prefer going where the wind takes me. It’s more adventurous.” He shrugged, a book in his hand that I didn’t think he’d actually spent any time reading since we’d snuggled up in his trailer.
Which was one of the things that I adored about Kaidan. Other people would ask what I was doing if I showed up out of nowhere, if I crawled into their bed and used them as my own personal body pillow, but Kaidan didn’t. He’d just spread his arms like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Of course, it was for us. It was normal, and it was the only physical contact I’d allowed in the years since I’d returned fromthat dungeon. Kaidan was a guide, not an esper, and we had zero sexual chemistry between us. It made this safe, a way to get something I knew I needed in the only way I knew how.
At least, it had been the only way until recently…
My cheeks heated as I thought about all the contact I’d gotten in the past few weeks.
