“My name is Admiral Postin. I’m from the group that oversees and works with the Guild. We like to think of ourselves as liaisons. I like to try to keep communication open and flowing so we run into fewer issues. The military likes to ensure that espers and guides have everything they could need to do their job well, after all.” He came across like a secretary, there to do whatever helped me out the best.
I knew better than to trust him, however. No one who rose that high in the ranks was innocent. Power never really settled well for anyone in my experience. “That doesn’t explain why you called me here, especially at a time when you knew I’d be alone.”
A twitch beside the Admiral’s eye suggested he wasn’t as unflappable as he wanted to seem, but he kept speaking like we were good friends. “The truth is that I met with Carter when he returned a few days ago, and our meeting was less productive that I would have liked.”
Probably even less than that, I’d guess. Carter didn’t care for people who thought they could tell him what to do, and I got that exact sense from this man. Sure, Carter didn’t typically come right out and defy anything, but he still made a point of somehow doing the opposite.
“What was it about?”As if I don’t know…
“I don’t like to beat around the bush too much, Ms. Moore. In my experience, time is far too precious to waste like that. We areaware of your unique abilities, and we want to ensure you have the space and guidance to flourish and use those abilities in the best way possible.”
On the surface, the offer sounded good. In fact, a part of myself I hated sat a little taller at the idea that someone had seen use in me, that I wasn’t getting tossed aside yet again. I knew better than to indulge in that line of thought, however, knew exactly how dangerous such attention could be.
“I’m a guide,” I said, keeping my voice neutral. “My use is guiding espers, and I’m doing that.”
“The fool who put you with Reject Squad was short-sighted—they didn’t realize how important you could be to the Guild. You could help the entire Guild, and eventually be paired with espers who are on your level of skill.”
“I’m fine where I am.”
He shook his head, his expression a carefully manicured show of false caring. It probably worked on most people, but me? I knew better than to think anyone truly gave a damn about me.
“You know that Reject Squad just barely holds their place in the Guild. They’re going to keep pushing the wrong people, keep making the wrong moves. They’re never going to climb any higher, so why anchor yourself to a sinking ship? Just because they’ve thrown away their future doesn’t mean you have to as well. Really think about what you want in your life. Can they actually give you that?”
I knew his words were nothing more than manipulation, but that didn’t stop them from landing.
What futuredidI want?
So far I’d thought more about survival, about short-term efforts, but what about a year from now? Ten years? Twenty?
Espers didn’t make it to old age much, but guides did. What didIwant to do? Could I picture myself with Carter in a decade?With Ingram as his tattoos started to sag? Forever wondering how Kenyon could be so dumb? With Shear’s unnerving gaze?
Was that even something they would want?
I couldn’t answer any of that, which made the questions all the heavier as they took up space in my head.
You can’t trust them.
The thought whispered through my mind, as it had so many times before. They needed me right now, but that was it. The moment I became inconvenient, that would change. They’d throw me away and perhaps this time, I’d have nothing. The Guild found an interest in me now, but who said they would in another six months? In another year?
Maybe you should listen to them.
What was keeping me from jumping ship? I’d saved the men, not the other way around. What if I looked out for myself for once? What if I did what was best for me instead of thinking about everyone else?
A shifting behind my eyes made me flinch, the sensation so gentle I nearly missed it. The moment it came, however, when I stopped and faced it, I recognized it. I thought about those words that had floated through my mind.
I let out a soft laugh and rubbed my eyes. I took one deep breath, then fortified the defenses of my mind, slamming them shut so hard that one of the two who wore esper insignia jerked backward.
Serves the asshole right.That thought I knew wasallmine.
I nailed the esper with a hard glare. “Stay out of my head. That time was just a warning.” I turned the same look on the military man who had spoken. “Don’t ever try that again. I’ve endured enough time around mentalists to know when they’re influencing me and how to stop it from happening. Now, understand that I signed a contract withmysquad, and I don’t plan on breaking it. The Guild hasn’t given a damn about me inyears, so I have no reason to think they’ve changed their mind all of a sudden. It was only months ago they were threatening to kick me out, so thank you for the offer, but I’m never going to accept it.” I got up, not giving a damn if I should stay there until they released me. I wasn’t military, I wasn’t even an esper, so I didn’t fall under the same chain of command they did.
“You could come to Obsidian.” The man in the suit didn’t appear ruffled, not even angry, as the others in the room did. Instead, he sat there, his hands folded and perched on his knee as he stared at me. Something about his look unnerved me now that I noticed it, something empty that made the void inside of Ingram look friendly. He made me want to cower with just that look.
“Obsidian is for espers.”
“It is for the extraordinary. You fit that definition as much as anyone. We have the proper tests and people there to understand what has happened to you, to help you understand it yourself. There is no better place for you.”
I recalled the shadows in Shear’s eyes at the mention of that place, the way the other espers had reacted to it. Even if some crazy part of me was tempted by the idea of a place that wanted me, where I would fit in, I knew better than to trust these men—or Obsidian.
