“You’re a guide—I know you feel that darkness inside of me, that emptiness. It’s this void, this shadow, and it’s always hungry. The more I use my powers, the worse it gets, but it never fully goes away.” He paused, pressing his lips together for a moment before letting out a soft sigh. “That’s not true.Youmake it go away, at least for a little while. It’s like this hunger that’s never satisfied except with you.” He rubbed his fingers over my cheek, the touch so oddly sweet it felt entirely wrong for us. That wasn’t the relationship we had.
“So you left last time—”
“Because I didn’t know what I might do to you if I stayed around you, and you sure weren’t looking all that ready for shit. That hunger, that need, it’s like this other thing inside of me and I didn’t trust it anywhere around you.”
“But now?”
He angled his hips, grinding against me in a hard stroke. “I just can’t resist it anymore. Everyone else is a cheap substitute, and I don’t want that. So you going to be a good girl and spread those pretty thighs for me? Can’t promise you much, but I can swear I won’t do a fucking thing to hurt you.” He stilled, staring down at me.
Which made it my choice. No alcohol to pretend anything was different, nothing to hide behind. Just this esper and me.
So I made yet another mistake and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulled myself up enough to reach his lips, and kissed him as deeply as he had me earlier.
If I was going to make a mistake, I’d make one hell of one.
Chapter Eight
Ingram
I’d never given a fuck what would kill me. It was something I barreled toward with every last thing I did, but what exactly got me in the end?
What did it matter?
The sensation of Yun reaching out for me, though, of her taking the initiative and kissing me first, was like looking at my own death. I had a feeling this woman could hold a knife to my throat and I wouldn’t care a bit, so long as she didn’t move away.
I’d never understood the need for anyone or anything in particular before. I wanted more, and more of what didn’t much factor in. So long as I could overindulge, so long as I could feed it into that void inside of me, nothing else mattered.
Yun, though, felt different. She was something I craved specifically, where nothing else would satisfy me.
To have the feeling, to keep that quiet peace, I’d let her drive in a knife no matter how deep.
However, she didn’t have a knife right now, so I focused instead on what I wanted, which was her stripped down and without anything between us. I craved the sounds of her moans, soft in the darkness, breathed against my ear. I needed those desperate noises she made, the ones full of hunger and need.
I grasped her slacks, it taking every last bit of restraint I possessed not to tear them off. Given that she didn’t have a lot of clothing, I was pretty sure that would only piss her off.Instead, I undid the fastener that sat just below her belly button, then curled my fingers into the waist of the fabric, grasping her panties at the same time and pulling both down her legs. I yanked off her shoes, taking the socks with them and tossing all of it aside.
As quickly as I did so, I spread her again and ran my flat palms up each inner thigh, moving until they reached the crux of her body, just a breath from her cunt.
Even still, I paused, just a heartbeat, to see if she’d flinch, if she’d pull away.
She shifted her hips forward, brushing her pussy against my thumbs.
So much for control.
I hooked a finger beneath her shirt and pulled it up, exposing her chest. She was still hidden behind a simple bralette, the fabric like a band rather than individual cups. I leaned in, dragging my tongue over one nipple through the obstruction as I twisted my other hand to rub directly at her clit.
Sometimes the best bet was to go for it, to throw yourself in and just hope for the best. It was how I’d lived a lot of my life, willing to just do it, consequences be damned. If I let her think too deeply about, well, anything, she might just decide this wasn’t a great idea. She might let her nerves get the best of her, and the idea of stopping seemed impossible. I wanted her overwhelmed and lost to pleasure.
She lifted her hips again, a quicker jerk that nearly felt like she was thrusting against me—fuck, did I like that.
I slid one finger into her, ready if she decided to burn out all my synapses for it.
She was tight—uncomfortably tight. It reminded me that I had to take it slow enough to get her fully ready. I didn’t usually go for virgins, but like always, Yun was an exception.
She whimpered, the sound something between desire and concern.
Slow, you stupid fucker.
No matter how badly I wanted this, it’d get yanked away if I wasn’t careful.
