“Yeah, but she was talkin’ about ya blood pressure and shit,” my brows dipped. “You takin’ your medicine and shit?”
My pops and my uncle were my heroes. All my life, I thought they were fucking invincible. I never saw either one of them down and out, weak or no shit like that. I’d witnessed them both put niggas on their asses and all, so when my mama told me Proof was having issues with his cholesterol and blood pressure, the shit haunted me. That was why I had to come through and lay eyes on his ass before I got busy for the night.
“Yeah, I’m taking it.” He chuckled as he took a seat at his table, placing his plate in front of him. “Since she can’t be here every day to worry me about the shit, she’s using your cousin,” he said, referring to Porcia. “She’s basically a miniature version of her now.”
“Don’t I know it.” I laughed lowly. “She stay fussin’ and shit.”
“Yeah, with her spoiled ass.” He shook his head then paused briefly to bless his food. Once he was done, he gave me his eyes momentarily. “Porcia told me she wasn’t talking to you.”
I smacked my teeth and waved him off. “She call herself havin’ an attitude, but she’ll be aight.”
“You gotta let her grow up, Loc,” he said and I frowned deeper.
I knew we weren’t kids anymore and my cousin was a grown woman now, but Porcia was still my baby. I wanted the best for her. I didn’t want her dealing with a street nigga, thinking about whether or not the nigga was gon’ make it home due to getting jammed up or killed, and I damn sure wasn’t going for no nigga having her in no kind of danger. I would for sure crash out for real.
“She’ll be aight,” I repeated then switched it up because I was standing on what I felt. “You good though? I’m ‘bout to be off radar for the night, but I wanted to make sure you were straight before then.”
“Oh yeah, it’s date night, huh?”
I shook my head. “My mama talk too fuckin’ much.”
“James was actually the one that told me.” He chuckled.
“Yeah? That ain’t playa. I’m gon’ have to rough yo’ little brother up.”
“Go barking up that tree if you want,” he teased. “But this is new for you. You usually stick and move.”
“Ain’t shit ‘bout that changed.” I smirked. “I gotta go at Diamond a lil’ differently though. She ain’t the type that’s moved by a nigga’s status or bread. She be makin’ me tighten up a lil’ when I come at her.”
“I like her already.” He chuckled.
“Ma do too.”
“Then you got a winner because that little ass woman doesn’t like anybody.”
“On Lord.” I laughed. “I ain’t ever met a woman I wanted to take home to her before, but if I had I wouldn’t even waste my fuckin’ time. She a tough fuckin’ critic.”
“Shoot yeah!” he agreed while laughing. “But she’s said all good things about this one, so maybe you’ve got a winner.”
“We gon’ see.” I had one of my arms folded across my chest while I pulled at my chin hairs thinking about Diamond’s pretty ass. “She the first woman I’m actually dating as an adult, so if the shit don’t go how I want then I’m gon’ be a bachelor for life.”
“You want to do that anyways. Ain’t nothin’ wrong with living life as a bachelor. You see how big Unc turned out.” He laughed.
“Word, but I don’t want hoes popping out with no kids and shit when I’m an OG,” I jibed. “And a nigga gon’ have to eat more than steak, Lord.”
“Fuck you nephew.”
“Naw, but let me ask you somethin’ Unc, you think I could be a father or a father figure?”
“I don’t see why not,” he shrugged. “Why?”
“Just curious.”
“Naw, you have to give me more than that, nephew. Why do you ask?”
“P asked me some shit about ol’ girl before I came inside,” I admitted. “He asked if I was ready to assume a paternal role for her niece if me and her go the distance. I ain’t even thought about that shit for real because we in the beginning stages, but now that he brought it up, I can’tstopthinkin’ about the shit.”
“Well, that’s not a question that you need to be asking me, Loco, that’s something you have to ask and answer yourself,” he replied before taking a bite of his steak. “I can tell you what I see in you—the potential, the good heart—but being a father or stepping into that role, ain’t something you get told you’re ready for. It’s something youdecideyou are.” He paused to let his words sink in. “You’ve got some good examples though. Yourfather never ran from responsibility. Your boys out here raising kids, and you know I stepped up as soon as I found out about my baby girl. If you got it in here,” he pointed to his heart, “to show up even when it’s uncomfortable, even when it’s not about you—then yeah, you got what it takes. But again, that’s not for me to say. It’s for you to figure out on your own.”
