“Sergeant Gibbs will be assisting on these cases. She’s already familiar with the files. I think she would be great for an undercover sting since she’s newer to the area.”
I didn’t miss the way Kelly tossed me a slick look over her shoulder or the way Tremaine avoided looking my way once he made the announcement. At this point, I was over the bullshit. If she wanted Hale, she could damn sure have his noncommittal ass. He could fuck whoever he wanted to as long as he knew he couldn’t fuck me over. I hated the day I opened my legs for him. I loved working in narcotics. It felt good to finally find my place in law enforcement. I didn’t want to let them force me out.
One thing I never wanted to do was let personal relationships get in the way of my career. What happened between Hale and me was a mistake. I regretted getting caught up in the situation and doing things I never thought I would do. I wished things would have gone differently, but I could never regret having my daughter.
I just wished that Hale saw things the same way. I shouldn’t have to fuck him in order for him to be there for his child. Neither was I going to continue to beg him to do so.
Not being active on the job didn’t stop me from wanting to contribute to the team. With that in mind, I raised my hand. I didn’t know why I felt like a hush fell over the room, but the atmosphere definitely changed as all eyes shifted to me. Hale looked at me as if I was intruding by raising my hand, but why have me here if I couldn’t give my two cents?
“Sutton?” he quizzed with lifted brows.
“There was mention of gambling when we did the Nelson case. I wonder if this connects back to?—”
“Thank you for your input, but we have it under control, Officer Sutton,” he said, cutting me off.
“Be that as it may, I think?—”
“You’re still on medical leave, Sutton. You’re only here as a formality,” he snapped.
The other officers in the room shifted uncomfortably in their seats. I was sure they were anticipating my response, but they wouldn’t get the show they were looking for today. I was over arguing and trying to make my name in spaces where it probably didn’t belong. I’d worked too hard to get where I was to let some high school nonsense make me lose my cool.
Kelly tossed her dirty blonde curls to one side as she paid me a withering glance. I couldn’t lie; that almost did it. I didn’t know what kind of game she and Hale thought we were playing, but I wasn’t about to be a part of it. They could do what they wanted to do in their spare time, but I didn’t appreciate whatever it was affecting my job.
Tremaine had probably been working extra hard to keep me out of the way so he could fuck her in peace. Little did he know, I didn’t give a damn what he did, as long as he did right by our daughter. I could have gotten him fired for sexual harassment by now for all the times he tried to bargain with me for sex since I’d cut him off. I didn’t want that kind of relationship with my daughter’s father. I preferred to keep things peaceful, but he was making it hard.
I pulled my lips between my teeth to help me bite my tongue. I wanted to curse Tremaine’s ass out for playing me like I had no business speaking up. Instead of putting him in his place and risking a showdown, I kept my cool.
“Understood.” I nodded.
Since it had been made clear that my attendance was just a formality, I zoned out for the rest of the meeting. That transfer was sounding better and better every day. I had no idea where I wanted to go, but I looked forward to getting back on the job and never having to entertain any of these people again.
I made the mistake of stopping by the break room to speak to someone I actually wanted to see and let Kelly corner me near the vending machine as I got a bag of the garlic butter popcorn I could only find there.
“Surprised to see you back, Sutton. If you could call it being back.”
“Again, I’m not sure why you’re so surprised to see me at a mandatory meeting.”
“Humph. What’s mandatory for some isn’t the same for others. Some people get special privileges around here.” she retorted.
“I wouldn’t know anything about that. What the hell do you want, Kelly?” I asked, tilting my head to highlight my impatience.
She did one of her fake giggles before continuing. “Straight to the point as always. I guess you don’t have time to play nicely since you spend so much of it playing with your child. I’m sure being a single mother must be hard on you.”
“If you have something you need to say, say it. Otherwise, move the fuck on.”
“I was just checking in on you. I can only imagine what new mothers have to go through, and with such a trying career. I’m sure you’re grateful that Tremaine was nice enough to extend your leave. I thought it was a good idea.”
I saw the glimmer in her eye. The need to poke and take jabs at me ate her pitiful ass alive. There were rumors about me and Lieutenant Hale in the office, but we both agreed to never verifythem. So far, it seemed that he at least kept up his end of the bargain when it came to that.
No one had to know who Bella’s father was because none of those people did a damn thing for her. Hale barely did a damn thing for her, so it wasn’t even about protecting him. It was about my integrity as an officer. Crystal and Sade were the only people that I told about our affair. I messed up, and it was my cross to bear. That didn’t mean I was going to give anybody the ammunition to use it against me.
“Hopefully you never have to find out,” I said, pushing past her and out of the break room.
When I made it to my car, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out but instantly pocketed it again when I saw that it was Tremaine. There was nothing for us to talk about right now. I sat there too long with my hands on the steering wheel, wondering what had become of my life and where I wanted it to go next.
For the past few months, I thought that if I could get back to the job, everything else would fall in place. Now that I had Bella, it became harder and harder to drag myself to a place where I was openly disrespected and still expected to put my life on the line. Something had to give.
2
