Ana sets her tablet down. “I can’t help you if you don’t follow the protocol. What’s really going on?”
I shrug, trying to compose myself. Everything feels precarious. I need to tread more carefully or risk Ana further limiting my work hours. I read the amended MotherWise contract when I was put on home rest; I know how this works.
“It’s been a tough week, that’s all. Our neighbor had a seizure and is in the hospital. She’ll be okay, but it was traumatic for everyone. We’ve been running a meal train, so extra cooking and shopping. And I’ve had a couple of, uh, challenging setbacks with my work project.”
Ana sets clasped hands on the tabletop. Her face softens. “Listen, Mathilde, I know your work is important to you. I get it—I worked through all my pregnancies, and while raising my four kids. Now, times were different back then…better in some ways, worse in others.”
She doesn’t elaborate, and I try to imagine what it would be like to have four kidsanda career. That’s highly unusual.
“But my job is to make sure you’re looking after yourself, and I’m good at my job.”
“I know,” I say.Do I sound appropriately regretful?“I’ll do better this week. Thrice-daily breath work sessions, for starters. And I’ll wear my—”
I pause, hearing something I can’t place. Wait to hear it again.Yes, there it is.First, theswoosh, swoosh, swooshsounds, but faint…and overtop of that, someone crying.
“Mathilde?”
“Do you hear that?” I ask Ana, glancing toward Shelby’s room. I can’t tell where the sounds are coming from. But then I remember Shelby isn’t home. She and Stanley are at the park. No one else is in the house.
“I don’t hear anything,” Ana replies, after listening for a moment.
It’s getting louder, the weeping. Distracting me, so I can’t focus on anything else. I can tell it’s a woman, the tone higher in pitch.
Maybe Clementine left her tablet on?But what could she have been watching that sounds like this? There are device controls to keep children from consuming upsetting content of any kind. Clem only watchesClara the Cloudand other similar shows deemed appropriate for her age.
The wails increase in intensity, soon filling the kitchen. I can’t even pick out theswish, swooshsound anymore.
“So, as I was saying, I think—”
“Shh!” I turn on Ana, setting a firm finger to my lips. My tone is rude, my actions aggressive. “You can’t hear that?”
It’s so loud now that there’s a reverberation inside me, like how the bass at a live music concert vibrates through you. I use my fingers to plug my ears, which unfortunately does little to stem the noise.
As I squeeze my eyes shut, Ana’s hand goes to my shoulder. She’s shaking me. A moment later the wailing stops. I remove my fingers cautiously, afraid it will start up again. It’s blissfully quiet.
Ana shakes me again, harder this time. She repeats my name when I don’t respond. Her brows knit together in concern when I finally look her way.
“It’s gone,” I say. “That’s a relief!”
I smile. Ana frowns.
—
I’ve earned a temporary leave from GIA and the Leclerc conservation.
“Two weeks.” Ana turns her tablet around for my fingerprint signature. “Then we’ll reevaluate.”
“But I’ll be almost thirty-six weeks pregnant by then.” I’m panicking, doing the math.
These next two weeks are critical, I tell her.I’m so close to completing the project.I make no move to sign Ana’s form.
She pushes the tablet closer to me. I still don’t move. “What if I don’t sign it?”
Ana gives me a look one would give a misbehaving toddler. “Mathilde, you are almost there! The most important thing is a healthy pregnancy and delivery. You can get back to work once you’re through this and the mandatory postpartum period.” MotherWise requires twelve weeks of complete focus on bonding with the infant.
“What if I have to dip into work during that bonding time?” I ask. “Like I said, this is such a critical—”
Ana gives a pointed look, interrupting me. “You’ll void your contract. And all of this would have been for nothing, honey.”
