They sat in comfortable silence, the kitchen warming as morning light filtered through the windows. Somewhere upstairs, a door closed. The pipes groaned as someone turned on a shower. A hairdryer hummed.
“So...you ready to see Laura this morning?” Beck studied him over the rim of his mug.
Seth shrugged, rolling his shoulders to ease the tension knotting there. “As ready as I’ll ever be. I hope she won’t change her mind about shared custody once I tell her about the three of us. I’ve really gotten attached to Hudson.”
Beck smiled. “I’ve gotten attached to the little shit, too.”
That made Seth laugh. “I know. I’ve seen it. He’s a teenager, so it’s a given he’s going to test his limits, but with affection and boundaries, he’s coming around.”
“Not as much pushback. And definitely a lot less snark,” Beck agreed, lowering his cup. “He can be a handful, but he’s got a good heart. It really shows when he’s not trying to act all tough. Especially around your mom.”
Seth nodded. “Exactly. She already loves him unconditionally. He needs more of that.”
“Yep.” Beck peered at him with curiosity. “It’s been…what, seventeen years since you saw Laura?”
“It has. We’ve talked on the phone a few times since Hudson moved in with us, but I haven’t actually seen her since I was fifteen.” Seth grimaced. “So I’m expecting this reunion to be awkward as hell.”
Beck tilted his head. “Were you serious about her back then?”
“I thought I was. Hell, I thought I was in love.” Seth gave a self-deprecating laugh. “But I was fifteen. I didn’t know what the fuck love was. And now that I do? I realize it was just a crush.”
Beck’s lips curved into a sly grin. “So teenage Seth was clueless? Shocking.”
“And you weren’t?” Seth’s mouth twitched despite himself. “At fifteen, you were still masturbating in the shower. You had no idea what a naked girl even looked like.”
“Bite my ass. Besides, I learned fast, thanks to Gloria.”
Together they laughed, but the levity faded. Seth’s expression turned serious. “All joking aside, I hate that I lost all those years with Hudson.”
“C’mon. What kind of father would you have been at fifteen?”
Seth shrugged, conceding the point. “Shitty. I couldn’t have been the father he needed as a teenager. I was just a kid myself. I would have tried, but…”
“Probably why Laura left. What about later, after you were grown and married?”
“Honestly? I’m not sure I would have been much better. Hudson would’ve created a mountain of friction between me and Autumn. She wouldn’t have handled Laura’s presence in my life well.”
Beck leaned forward slightly. “Because she would have been jealous? You hadn’t touched Laura in years.”
“That wouldn’t have mattered,” Seth said without hesitation. “Autumn never felt comfortable around my family. Mom didn’t like her much, so adding an ex and a kid into the mix?” He shook his head. “That would’ve been a disaster.”
“Grace seems to like most everyone. What did she have against Autumn?”
“She thought Autumn was too needy, too clingy. Lacked independence. That was true, but…”
“Even then your inner Dom wanted to care for and protect her.”
“Exactly. And anything that took my focus from Autumn scared her. She hated my job, so she would have viewed Laura as a threat and Hudson as competition for my attention.” Seth shrugged. “After she and Tristan died…I wouldn’t have been capable of even being present for Hudson, much less giving him what he needed. To find Silas, I went dark. Worked for Nikolai. I disappeared for almost a year. Hudson would’ve been…eight? Nine? Too young to understand why his dad abandoned him. So even though Hudson’s childhood was rough and I hate that he was damn near grown before we met…it was probably for the best.”
Beck studied him, clearly turning that over in his head. “Things happen for a reason.”
Seth met his eyes and nodded slowly. “Even when those reasons suck.”
The sound of footsteps on the stairs drew their attention. Then Heavenly appeared in the doorway, flashing them both a warm smile as she headed for the coffeemaker. “Morning.”
Hudson trailed behind her, dressed and ready but still half-awake as he poured a glass of orange juice. “Hey.”
“Morning, you two,” Seth greeted.
